Aight so, like many of my peers, I will be graduating this year and entering the real world. I will be leaving the comfy luxury of this fine educational institution and having to make my own way. And, just as so many of us will be in the coming months, I applied for a real world job. These are the stages of this process, because quite frankly, I’m terrified and I want to pawn my feelings of anxiety off on everyone else.
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You realize you need a real world job. What? I can’t just work in retail the rest of my life? How else am I supposed to maintain my lifestyle which includes excellent fashion and the freedom to do whatever I want on random days of the week?
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You assess your skills. What job wants a 22 year-old whose greatest achievement thus far is knowing how to use every microwave she comes across?!
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You actually gain confidence. Hey now, I can sway that and say I’m a quick learner, adaptable and flexible . . . right?
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You quickly lose that confidence. I am the worst.
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You regain that confidence. I am the best.
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You actually start that application. I totally have all the qualifications! This application is easy!!!
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You get halfway through the application before getting stumped. How the hell do I answer this question? How am I supposed to know where I see myself in 10 years? I don’t even know what I’m having for dinner tonight! . . . That’s a lie I’m making a frozen pizza.
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You let the application sit for a bit. Inspiration will come. Imma watch “Riverdale” now.
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You realize you need recommendations. WHO IS GOING TO RECOMMEND MY MEDIOCRE SELF?
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You call your one connection. PLEASE LIKE ME PLEASE LIKE ME PLEASE LIKE ME
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Your connection agrees to put in a word. @ GOD THANK YOU
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You still have to actually apply. Dangit.
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You buckle down and get to work. You got this. You really got this.
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You break down again. One more crying jag sound good to you? OKAY!
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You get your shit together and actually submit the application. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH
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And now… you wait. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
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Repeat. Lol, you thought you only had to do this once?!?!?!
So yeah, that’s pretty much it. I’m currently waiting. Please keep me and everyone in my position in your thoughts.