Last year I downloaded Tinder during the month of October and deleted it after approximately five days. This October, I decided to return and make it new tradition. Just like last time, in my profile picture I was holding up a tortilla featuring a nibbled likeness of Lord Voldemort – aka Voldemortilla.
Knowing some of the messages my friends have received, I decided to profess in my “About Me” that if I got vulgar messages I would respond with random Wikipedia articles. This effectively stopped guys from sending me nasty things; some even asked if they could have random Wikipedia articles without being vulgar! I spent my five days educating them about unnecessary topics. Here are the highlights:
1. Peter was excited when his Wikipedia article was about The White Parade, a 1934 film by his favorite director, Irving Cummings. What a coincidence!
2. I matched with a guy named Dana. He asked me to marry him because it would be fun and people would be very confused. That’s not happening. I’m not that committed to a joke.
3. Joey learned a lot during his conversation with me. His first article on YX Energi (a Norwegian and Dutch gas station chain) was not long enough to keep him amused. Karl Eberhard Schöngarth (a German SS war criminal) was too sad. He specifically requested something more uplifting. He received an article about Witenwasserenstock, a mountain in the Lepontine Alps. How’s that for uplifting, Joey?
4. After I sent Sean an article about PEST analysis (Political, Economic, Social, and Technological), I realized he might take it the wrong way and think I was calling him a pest. Thankfully, he was not insulted. He went on to learn about Sam Manekshaw, the First Field marshal of the Indian Army. We bonded over mutual love of burritos.
5. I sent Tim a link to the Wikipedia page for the Nissan Rogue but he apparently wasn’t amused. After that, he never responded. Maybe he drives a Nissan Rogue and thought I was stalking him. Who knows?
I look forward to next October’s five-day Tinder experience.