You are not wanted….
Not the kind of thing you like to hear is it? Sadly, we deal with rejection on a daily basis from our bosses, teachers and, in general, people we like. No matter who it comes from or the situation it comes up in, rejection hurts and learning to deal with it properly is a necessary life skill.
Applying for a spot in the study abroad program, rushing for a sorority, or running for president of a club are all great examples of how you can try your best and be shot down. It feels rotten knowing someone did not want you or see you fit for a position, but all things happen for a reason. Through your anger or hurt it is hard sometimes to see the good in a situation and we hyper-focus on the negative. Life is full of opportunities and sometimes the best ones come from unexpected situations. Take a breath before you say something you regret. Once you say something, you can’t take it back, so wait until you are by yourself to let out any emotions you are harboring. Sometimes in the heat of our anger, we take things out on the people we love or those who tried to help us.
Rejection from someone you like is a typical occurrence in college with a constant sense of ‘twitter-pation’ looming over us all. However this is not the end of the world! So many people think that their world will fall apart or how their life would have been so much better if that person would have liked you back. Stop for a moment and remember that life was just fine before this person made an appearance and it will be fine if they are not involved anymore. Yes, some relationships are worth fighting for but make sure you are looking at the situation with a clear mind. Sometimes we want things to work out so badly that we just keeping trying to rebuild a relationship that has already hit the rocks.
The key is to bottle up that rejection and that negative energy and turn it into something positive. Get involved in a different activity to give you a feeling of achievement. Write out goals for yourself– some short term and some long term. Visualize yourself achieving this goal, and try to imagine success in your mind before you fall asleep. The best advice I can give is to ultimately keep yourself busy. The more time you have on your hands, the more time you have to think about what is bringing you down.
Sometimes we are on the other side of the situation and need to reject someone else. It is key to not lead the person on to believe you are interested. The longer you lead someone on the harder they will fall in the end. Remember to be polite and get to your point quickly, trying not to make a bunch of excuses. Put yourself in their shoes and treat them as you would wish to be treated.
Keep in mind: “I am not judged by the number of times I fail, but by the number of times I succeed. And the number of times I succeed is directly related to the number of times I fail and keep trying.”
Photo Credit:
http://www.mentalhelp.net/poc/view_doc.php?type=doc&id=29104&w=5&cn=1