Dear Love,
It’s been a year since I’ve written to you last. Much has changed since then, and I definitely have a different view of you now. College feels like a different universe, and it seems like my experiences with you before college was a lifetime ago.
Throughout my first year, I was more of a witness to love, watching you take over the lives of my peers. You drove them crazy, making them question themselves and their feelings and the other person they were involved with. I became someone they talked to, a counsel of sorts when it came to you. It was funny because I was kind of pessimistic about you back then, still hurt from the damage you did and the closure I never got. Still I had hope for my friends, telling them not to give up on you because it will be worth it. Months later, they’ve figured things out and they’re very happy now…all thanks to you. So I guess you’re not too bad after all, just a little difficult to work with.
I got my first glimpse of you when my friend set me up that one fateful night. I went to have fun and dance, let out all the stress from mid-semester projects and tests. I didn’t expect you to show up, but you did. It was a connection of similar interests, and the conversation never hit a wall. I was caught up in getting to know you again, but I was also being cautious and taking my time with things. Turns out you were moving too fast for me to catch up, and so I let you go to save myself from another disaster. I was right in doing so, because now I’ve learned you were completely different from who I thought you were.
Then I got obsessed with you again in the form of a celebrity; it was much easier to be in love with an idea of someone than deal with an actual person. It was like that for a while, and I was content with where I stood with you. My celebrity became my constant, an outlet where I released all my romantic dreams and ideas upon without the consequences.
This year, you snuck up on me. It was only the second week of school, but I was already so busy completing assignments and preparing for my club’s fundraiser that I became overwhelmed with everything and completely forgot about you. But you were there with me the whole time, taking the form of an unexpected person in my life. You helped me with the biggest events I’ve had to plan, showing your support and sticking around. You did the unexpected, and it was a surprise that made me really happy. I’m not sure where you’ll take me next, but I’m definitely along for the ride.
This Valentine’s Day, I saw you everywhere. I saw you in the man getting flowers for his wife just as he got out of class, in the girl that bought flowers for her friend, in the couple that surprised each other with gifts. I was surrounded by you, and for the first time in what feels like a long time, I loved Valentine’s Day (and not just for the discounted chocolates).
So Love, cheers to you: you’ve turned a cynic into a hopeful (but not romantic) girl. I know you’re not done with me yet, but at least this time I won’t be so against you.
Love, A Human