This is my second article concerning college. This article I’m talking about settling into college, and the expectation that you chose the school best fit for you.
I chose Kenyon primarily on a feeling. Call it cheesy or whatever, but Kenyon didn’t just feel like a campus, it felt like a home. Coming from Los Angeles, which can typically be cold, I was pleasantly welcomed by the niceness and hospitality of the people on campus. I didn’t know exactly in what area I wanted to study, so I was looking at other factors.
For my friend from high school at Syracuse, she knew that she wanted to study at New House for a particular program. She also had a particular size in mind, and knew that she wanted a school with good spirit. My other friend went to WashU for the Midwestern kindness (represent!) and the work hard play hard environment.
I could go on and on, and ask every person at Kenyon why they chose this school over another school. Personally I think it’s unfair to ask an 18 year-old to choose where they want to be for the next four years of their life; furthermore, that we should have an idea of what they want to do with the rest of their life is preposterous to me. But I digress.
What I’m trying to get at is that we’re all in the same boat. You could have applied to your college early decision and have one friend who’s a transfer student and another for whom this school was the last on their list. My point? You’re all sitting at the same table in the dining hall, going through the same motions. Want to get even broader? Talk to your friends about your daily schedule. Crazy how I can be in bed watching Netflix at 11 pm on a Tuesday in the village of Gambier, and across the country my friend at Santa Cruz is doing the same thing. For the most part, no matter whether you’re at a small college or a large university, you’ll do the same things. You’ll spend late nights in the library, go to parties on the weekends, stay up with friends eating junk food, and Facetime your dog (ok, maybe that last one is just me). Maybe the work in the library that you’re doing is different, or your tailgate is my Horn concert, but in essence it’s not all that different day to day.
I had the expectation that college was going to be this groundbreaking time where I found myself and truly transformed into the butterfly that I was always destined to be. I was going to get a liberal arts education, and a la Josh Radnor, read good books and have compelling arguments and be so liberal and dang artsy.The reality is that it took me a long time to get adjusted to Kenyon, and even longer to really feel convinced that there it’s the right school for me. Do I still get FOMO, or anxiety that there could be a better school out there for me? All the time. Mostly I blame the college application process for this unnecessary mindset. Every college has problems, and even with perfect colleges with no problems, there are still gross moments, like all nighters in the third-floor library or dismal food options in the dining hall.
My friend Eve encapsulates it best: “I love love it here and yet…at certain points in the semester I feel like I’m living in a pressure cooker that’s about to explode.” So if it’s your first year at college and you’re unsure about your situation, you’re in the sophomore slump, itching to go abroad, or ready to graduate to get out in the real world…it’s okay. College will have great moments and bad moments, and it’s best to not ruminate on your decision to go to any one college because ultimately…it’s just four years of your life.
And certainly there is validity to transferring, and I definitely know people who have felt it necessary to go to a different university for a different experience. But for the little things? Don’t sweat it.
So no, college may not be the best four years of your life. Maybe you’ll be homesick, or struggle with what to study, or feel as though the resources are inadequate. At any rate, any place you choose will have bumps and obstacles. What’s important is that it’s a time that you grow, stretch your mind, and get to know yourself more.