Dear (Insert Nickname for Your Best Friend),
I always thought that a best friend was someone who was in it for the long haul, someone that would be there for me through every step of my life. You knew me and stuck with me through my bad elementary school haircuts, middle school emo phase, and awkward braces days. We played Barbies together, roasted s’mores together at camp, and you always patiently listened to me rant about my crushes. We talked about finding husbands together, having a joint wedding, and having kids that would then also become best friends.
When we committed to our respective schools and computed the distance that would be between us, I knew that our friendship would have to stretch and it would take worth, but it’d be worth it. But lately, it’s getting harder for me to follow through on Facetime dates, Skype calls, and group texts with our other high school friends. I feel exhausted trying to tell you stories about what happened over the weekend, because it takes so long to explain first what Old Kenyon is, and what happens there, and by the time I’ve clarified what’s what and who’s who, I’m exhausted and don’t have the patience to even ask you about your weekend.
You know my first kiss story so well you could recite it yourself. We figured out what tampons were together, and laughed awkwardly as we tried to figure out how to use them. We cringed at our first tastes of alcohol, and wondered why people liked that stuff. When I look back on all the big milestones of my life, you’re right there along with me.
So here’s the thing: sharing all these experiences together made us closer, and I value who you are and what you’ve represented in my life. You were vital in a point in my life when I was experiencing new things and trying to form my identity. But now I’m in college, and I’m in a different state, literally and figuratively (please ignore my puns, because they’re still not funny). I’m at a point where I need to do some good ol’ independent soul-searching right here in Gambier, and I know that you and all of our other friends are spread across the United States doing the same.
I think what I’m trying to say is that if my life was a story, it’s comprised of chapters and maybe you’re not meant to be a main character, and you were just there to get the plot rolling. And I know that that hurts…trust me, I’m dealing it with myself. But I’m writing this to let you know that this is a good thing; we’re changing, evolving, and maturing. It’s exciting to look on Facebook and see your college album with all your new friends, and it’s refreshing to not know all of their names and backstories. I’m learning that it’s okay to not play an active role in everyone’s life, and that our relationships can stay alive through reminiscing on old childhood memories, inside jokes, and awkward ex-boyfriends.
What I’m trying to say is, don’t get mad at me when I forget to respond to your text in our high school group chat. It’s not that I’m mad at you, and I definitely haven’t forgotten what an important role you’ve played in my life. It’s just that I’m in a new place where I need to prioritize myself, and the potential new memories that can blossom here. It’s okay if we lose touch a little bit because I know that when we’re back in town we’ll be able to pick right back up where we left off. And if it’s awkward, that’s okay. All that means is that we’ve both changed and we can learn to appreciate that we are having our own adventures in this new chapter in both of our lives. I love you and want you to know that you will always have a place in my life.
(Insert Inside Joke that is Nostalgic and Will Make You Both Laugh and Cry).
Sincerely,
(Your Best Friend’s Nickname for You)
Image Credit: Tumblr, CDN Teens, The Odyssey Online, Disney Blogs