We all know and have been through the stress that comes with being a college student. Not just is it hard to manage our grades and make sure we are on top of checking deadlines and due dates, but a lot of us students are involved in other obligations, and not to mention have personal things in the background that we have to deal with. Whether it may be having a job on the side (which could mean working once a week or full time), being involved in Greek life, being apart of any club or other organization, etc. our lives all tend to get pretty hectic. I for one, especially know what it feels like to be busy and wrapped up in so many things at once. But to get to my point, we all can usually find ways to manage our busy lives and the obligations we have to attend to, but how do we continue when our personal lives get in the way with unexpected and unfortunate things that can make things seem impossible? Going with that, how is our emotional well being holding up under all the pressure and stress?
I am a junior in college this year and the years before me have been pretty rocky. I myself, have always been a super busy person. Starting last year and then continuing this semester, I have felt the pressure of an impending mental breakdown. Balancing many things in my life, like being a full time student, working full time, being in a sorority and even writing for this magazine… things get crazy to say the least. It is one of those things where you can almost be addicted to the business in your life and the sense of accomplishment when we are able to get everything done week by week, but when you run on 4-5 hours of sleep a day and get sick every other week, something needs to change. For me the tiredness and the overwhelming amount of tasks I needed to take care of wasn’t what was dragging me down, but its the added stress behind the scenes got me.
You see, what seems like day 1 my life has always been rocky, but starting my sophomore year in college and also being a commuter from home, things became very messy when many misunderstandings and trouble came array. Personal for myself, the situations on hand where outrageously difficult, but what made it worse was to not have the support I needed. I was not able to receive the support I needed, because my rock, my father of whom I leaned on, was very sick and in the hospital. I had always had an older dad and he happened to be accident prone as well, which is not a good combination. He had gotten in a terrible car accident when I was just a few years old and since then he has had medical problems left and right like you wouldn’t believe. He started becoming pretty sick all throughout my high school years and then into my college years as well. When all of my sophomore year troubles were occurring, that is also when my father was put on Hospice and passed away on February 15, 2017.
The death of a loved one, especially a parent, leaves a hole in your heart and an inconsolable pain like you will not believe. I know the say it takes time, but things almost get harder as time passes on because everyday I feel that I realize just the little things my father did that I do not get to experience anymore. Things like not being able to sit on his lap again (I was a daddy’s girl), break my heart. I still find myself having really hard Dad days but I find ways to cheer myself up again… which is what I have always done. Because I am an independent person, I have always managed to deal with stuff on my own. I grew up in a family who basically represented tough love and wasn’t much for talking about feelings to one another. Yes, it was hurtful for me but it made me who I am. With my dad’s death and the huge mess from last year, I found that everything happens for a reason, even though we may never know the understanding behind it. All of these misfortunes that a person undergoes at a time that may seem like no good will ever come, I promise you it is not the end of the world and there is still light at the end of the tunnel. I learned that a thick skin and ability to bounce back is a quality that all can be proud of from these learning and life experiences.
Going back, everyone is busy and feels the pressure in their lives as a college student. Being able to manage it all is amazing but just know you are not alone and can get support from several places. There are support services on every campus, you can get support from your sisters or brothers in Greek life, from your roommates and from your friends and family for whatever your troubles may be. People are there to listen and be there for you to make your life easier at the time. There are also small things to do to de-stress your own self such as take the time to take a long hot shower/bath, get your nails done, get a massage, take off a day of work. Even go on a road trip, read a book, bake something and even just to take a nap or go to bed early. We all are hard workers working toward our success and deserve happiness. Bottom line is we all have our own stories within ourselves and honestly “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”