I met Julia* during my freshman year of high school. She sat in front of me in one of my classes and we would always talk before class started. We seemed to have a lot in common; we both loved animals, we loved reading, we were obsessed with makeup, good grades were our first priority, and we shared a lot of the same opinions. As I went through my classes that year, I found myself with a group of five new friends, Julia included. We hung out before first period every morning and always got together on the weekends. I couldn’t believe how lucky I was to have a group of best friends my freshman year.
Sophomore and junior year came and went and our friendship became more tightly-knit than ever. But by senior year, Julia and I started hanging out on the weekends without the rest of our friends. We would go out to eat, to the library and shopping, have sleepovers and eat our favorite comfort foods, while watching our favorite movies. We introduced each other to new hobbies, music and interests, and we became inseparable. We were those best friends that took up the entire inside front cover of each other’s yearbooks to write letters about how much we valued our friendship, making promises to stay best friends all throughout college.
The last few months of senior year were interesting. Julia and I grew very much apart from our other four friends. It became just the two of us hanging out together all the time. The dynamic had changed and our other friends realized Julia and I had a bond that wasn’t reciprocated with anyone else.
The summer before we went off to college, Julia and I had countless sleepovers. We went out nearly every day, trying to spend as much time together as possible, before our college workload got in the way. But when school started up again, things changed. As similar as we were, we each handled college very differently. I did my homework last minute, staying up all night to get things done, while Julia would do homework all day, every day so she would never be behind with her assignments. Our everyday texting turned into quick conversations a few times a week because Julia needed to focus on her schoolwork. We couldn’t hang out until the fall semester was over because Julia needed the weekends to study.
College brought out a very precise, meticulous side of Julia I never saw during high school. I’m a very go-with-the-flow kind of girl and because of this, Julia stopped seeing eye-to-eye with me. In between the fall and spring semesters, the few times we hung out were filled with an abundance of awkward silences. Rather than talk about anything and everything like we had in high school, we didn’t know what to say to each other. Talking to Julia was like talking to a relative you only saw once a year.
I’ll never fault Julia for her personality. College had a certain effect on her, and that’s okay. I’m now a junior and I haven’t spoken to Julia since right before sophomore year started. I absolutely miss her. She was someone I could tell all my secrets to, someone I could rely on to cheer me up when I was feeling down. She always made sure I felt good about myself and she always had my back when I was feeling stressed out. There have been so many times where I wished I could text Julia and tell her about something that happened. I’ll laugh at things and immediately think of how Julia would laugh at it too. Losing her friendship created a small void in my life and not a day goes by where I don’t wonder how she’s doing.
For those of you who have grown apart from a best friend, you know how hard it can be. It can be incredibly difficult to move on; how can you go day in and day out without texting that person you basically considered to be a sibling? Eventually you find new people to confide in and build bonds with. You smile and laugh and celebrate your new friendships, all the while hoping your old friend is doing the same.
*Names have been changed