This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Harvard chapter.
After months of trial and error, this is what I’ve learned so far about dating and relationships.
Be yourself. Sometimes you might think you’re too smart or too opinionated or too accomplished for a guy to handle it. Some men are intimidated by you and you might think you should dumb yourself down to accommodate them. But please, don’t do it! You want someone who likes you for who you are, so act like it! Also, how long can you pretend to be someone you’re not? It’s exhausting. There are a lot of things in life that are difficult and exhausting. Your relationship shouldn’t be one.
Don’t frantically look for a relationship. Have you ever noticed that when you’re in a rush and desperately looking for something, you can’t find it? And then you give up and sit there for a second to see it was right in front of you. I think this is a good analogy for most things in life. Just relax and everything’s going to be okay. Promise!
Know that you are good enough. You might think “maybe if I were a bit skinnier…”, “maybe if my skin looked better…”, “maybe if my nose looked like this…” Stop! You are enough and if the shape of your nose is what deters someone from you, then good riddance!
Be bold. Women are always told that they should be the passive ones. Men have to make the first move and women basically can’t choose and should be chosen instead. This is wrong. Maybe the cute guy you want to talk to is too shy to come talk to you but he really wants to! You never know until you go up and talk to him and there is nothing wrong with that.
Don’t be afraid of rejection. This is why a lot of girls don’t make the first move. It’s understandable. Rejection hurts. You feel like your self-esteem is crushed and no one will ever like you. Well, always remember that “You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, but there will always be someone who hates peaches.” You are a peach! And you should believe it. And just because there are some people who don’t like you, it doesn’t mean you’re not an absolutely lovely lady.
Relax and have fun. If you’re having a horrible time dating, you’re doing it wrong! Just relax and go with the flow. You’re young and you have your whole life ahead of you. Life is beautiful and full of surprises. So let things happen the way they were meant to.