Have your roommates and friends begun to disappear? Have they taken up odd hours, those best described as nocturnal? Do they no longer eat human food, but now have begun to survive solely on redbull and coffee? If any of these sound familiar, run, hide and find a doctor because those people in your life have fallen victim to Harvard’s personal version of Halloween!
We all know that every October gouls, ghosts and goblins, witches and warlocks, zombies and vampires all come up and out of the darkness/underworlds in which they reside on All Hallows Eve. What most people don’t know is that a special aura exists around Harvard’s campus, an aura of magical proportions that is activated for the entire month of October. Once triggered, many students fall victim to the aformentioned transformation. They become zombified: their eyes become permanently bloodshot, their hair begins to resemble that of a mad scientist’s, and they deliriously begin chanting formulas and key terms as if they were spells. It’s a month-long haunted Harvard; groans linger throughout campus, in the D-halls, in the dorm/house rooms, and those who have somehow escaped this transformation cry for salvation from the monsters they once called friends. Why does this happen? What could cause such a monstrosity?!…..
The answer my friends is MIDTERM season! If you have a midterm and mistakenly believe that Lamont is the best place on campus to achieve maximum study potential, then you’re 1) completely misinformed about the risks that you are superimposing upon yourself by swiping in and 2) are at a higher risk of becoming a victim of Lamont (a.k.a a LAMONSTER)! It’s said that the first victim of Lamont is the sole source of Harvard’s midterm magic and that he still lives within the walls of the library, so this Halloween season beware of your “friends” and stay safe!