Dormcest 101

Dormcest. It’s as much a feature of the freshman dating scene as awkward flirting in Annenberg. And maybe it’s inevitable. After all, that hot guy you met the first day at the entryway meeting seems cool. And you see him all the time. And he’s going to the same party Friday night… Pause. This could be the beginning of something really fantastic. It could also be the beginning of a whole lot of drama! I can’t tell you not to commit dormcest, but if you venture into the complex world of dorm romance, it’s best to go in with some knowledge. So here it is. Dormcest 101:

• Don't do it for a hookup. You know how awkward it is running into that guy you made out with on the dance floor when you were drunk Saturday night? Imagine if he lived in your building. And you saw him every morning when you went to class. And at every entryway study break. And at every IM game you went to… You get the picture. Dormcest can get messy, so make sure you’re doing it for someone you see yourself with long term.
• Think carefully before you plunge. Normally I would never suggest thinking about the end of a relationship before it starts, but with dormcest, you need to think things through before you make your decision. If you start dating him, can you handle essentially living together from day one of the relationship? Could you handle still living together if you guys broke up a couple months later? Be honest with yourself. If you can picture the two of you in the trailer for The Break-Up, it’s probably best to cool things off until you’re not sharing space and entryway-mates. Because…
• No one likes a drama queen. Especially one they’re living with. If things do go badly in the end, play it as cool as you can. The whole entryway doesn’t need to know about all the ups and downs of your relationship. Drag everyone into a battle and the living environment in your dorm will get really awkward really fast. Whatever happens, it’s between the two of you, so keep your mutual acquaintances out of it.
• Don’t block together.Even if you make it through one year of dormcest, it’s still probably not the best idea to commit yourself to four. Enough said.
• If you go for it, go for it.There are a million reasons I could give you not to commit dormcest, and you definitely need to be realistic about what it’s going to be like, but in the end, maybe the perfect guy for you really does live in your freshman entryway. So if you think you’re in it for the right reasons, go for it, girl.