Friendships are supposed to be mutually productive, supportive and fun. We may or may not realize it, but we all may have that one friend who constantly tires us out; they complain, they have a never-ending list of demands, and they ridicule us. Sometimes we find ourselves angry at them and can’t quite put our finger on what it was that they said or did. However, these friendships take a toll physically and emotionally and they are a serious threat to our general well-being. It’s important to know that even though you might feel obligated to them for whatever reason, it might be time for a breakup. Here are the signs:
(Note: There is excessive eye-rolling in this article)
1) Clingy
Even though its important to have friends who support you, this friend always need you. If you find yourself wondering why you don’t have your alone time, it could be due to this friend. They need you to eat with them, walk with them, study with them, and so on. They also have this tendency to violate your personal space. They always get mad at you and make you feel guilty for hanging out with someone else who is not them.
2) Stubborn
This friend persistently argues with you and refuses to accept their flaws. They always refute their argument with “Yeah, but…” as this is their favorite phrase. They don’t listen to your advice even though they ask for advice and they have a never ending list of justifications for their behaviors because they are “perfect”.
3) Negative
This friend has never heard the phrase “Look on the bright side”. They are always complaining because nothing in their life is seemingly going well. They could have just won the lottery and you wouldn’t even know because they are complaining about how they have to claim their prize in person at Town Hall and how it is so much work (or something like that…).
4) Unsupportive
This friend doesn’t support your dreams or any of your success. Did you just get that new job you’ve been wanting for a while? While a normal friend would applaud and commend you, your toxic friend almost always immediately brings up the fact that you only got hired for so and so reason. Your successes are never brought up, and your failures are magnified.
5) You Feel Judged
If you feel like you have to speak through a filter with your friend, then it might be a sign that you need to have a breakup. This friend does not accept your past, your dreams, or recent decisions. They just point out the flaws in your decisions as they “know what’s best”. Yeah FYI, they don’t know what is best.
6) Immoral
This friend always justifies their actions, even if their actions are morally wrong. They cheat on tests, they backstab supposedly close friends, they lie, and shoplift. They have some reason or excuse for their wrongdoings and never seem to accept the fact that what they did was wrong. Your little indiscretion is 500 times worse than that time they shoplifted a pack of gum. They are never at fault for anything.
7) You Dread Seeing Them
This one is self-explanatory. If you feel anxious or annoyed every time you have to meet this friend, then this is a problem. If you get a sudden flood of distress when this friend’s name pops up on the phone, then it is time to say goodbye.
8) You’re Arguing all the Time
You guys are arguing over every issue imaginable. You argue over the little things, the big things, politics, what to eat for dinner, and the list goes on and on…
9) They trash talk all the people important to you
People who are important to you are never good enough in their eyes. There is something wrong with your best friend, your mom, and your cat. You have to defend those you love to them and you should never have to do that.
10) They are another person when they are trying to impress someone
This friend has several personalities. When they are with you they are demoralizing and pessimistic. However, when they meet someone new, especially a potential love interest, they literally become a ball of sunshine. They are bubbly, smiley, and perky. Everything this other person says is hilarious and they agree with this other person on everything, even though you had an argument the other day about how pizza is the best food in the world, and they so passionately called pizza the most disgusting food in the world.
If you find yourself angry or frustrated everytime you are with your “friend”, then you might need to rethink your relationship. If you are adamant about your relationship and repairing it, then you should have a talk with this friend. However, if you are not interested in repairing your relationship with this person, then this single fact says it all: you are much better off without them.