*Her Campus FSU does not promote illegal behavior and encourages all students to make smart, healthy decisions. This article does not represent the views of Her Campus FSU.
Welcome to the latest in relationships, sex, love and dating. Introducing, “The Scoop with Szmuc” (Smook) and no, that’s not pronounced schmuck. Every week we’re giving our readers an opportunity to send in their questions to Her Campus FSU staff writer and relationship guru Sharon Szmuc relating to the theme of the week.
This week’s theme is how to get his attention. With basketball season in store, FIFA tournaments being held at Madison Social and the semester kicking in, lately all guys have been clueless. They complain that they aren’t getting laid but never think about the fact that girls want to get laid just as badly as them. When we text them at 2 a.m. to come over and they say “Nah babe not tonight,” we assume he’s not DTF at all. But let’s be real, it’s probably that he is on his last round of 2K and will not pay attention to you until he is done kicking his roommate’s a**. Well aside from wanting to slap them for stupidity, there’s other ways to wake up these guys and get them to notice us. It doesn’t just involve wearing a low-cut dress, but according to mainstream Hollywood movies, this does work.
Photo By: Hana Bilicki
Jennifer M.* 21
This guy in my Film Theory class is kinda hot and I always want to approach him. I tried sitting next to him to see if he would make conversation, but he’s always looking down at his desk. How do I get him to talk to me?
Jen, Jen, Jen,
I applaud you for already making the first move of sitting next to him. But this just means you’ll have to sit next to him the rest of the semester, since in college we still think we have assigned seats or something. I would tell you to wear your sexiest outfit and pretend that going to class is like going to Recess on a Friday, but maybe you should leave the high-waisted shorts and crop top for when it’s not below fifty degrees; he might just think you’re more ridiculous than Hitchcock’s films. The best thing to do in this scenario is to play dumb. Hit him with a, “Hey, do you think they’ll be a quiz today?” This forces him to answer you because if he doesn’t, then he’s a f*cking douche and you deserve someone who isn’t selfish and wants you to pass a quiz, g-d*mn it!
But seriously, if he does answer the next best thing you can do is to continue the conversation by discussing the movie and asking questions like, “What do you think she’ll ask?” “What you think of the ending of the film?” or “Oh, your minor is also film?” Pretend you’re playing a game of 20 questions and there’s a timer—you have 10 minutes to ask anything you can as long as the question isn’t “Are you a virgin?” because that will offend him. If he actually looks up from his desk, it’s because he grew some balls to talk to a girl for once. He might not even realize how hot he is, but that’s why there are people like you, Jen, who can remind all the hot clueless guys in the world to look up once in a while at a girl’s face, and not just stop at the tits. On the bright side, now that you did make conversation the next move is more fun: playing hard to get.
–Sharon
Sara D.* 20
My friends and I have been hanging out lately with this group of guys we met at The Strip at the beginning of the semester. For now everyone is just friendly and we usually have pregames. There is the one guy who sometimes shows up to the pregames and I really want him to talk to me, but he’s always hanging around his two buddies.
Dear Sara,
I don’t know how good you are at beer pong, but I suggest you buy yourself a beer pong table and practice a few rounds with your roommate. At the pregame, you and your roommate should approach his buddies and your crush and ask if they would be down to play a round.. Confidently say, “prepared to get your a**es kicked” (when we all know in reality you can’t wait to slap that nice booty, assuming he’s a baseball player). During the game, try to make it in the cups. If you don’t make a single cup, I guess your crush will see you and your roommate naked before you can even get his Instagram handle. In that case, I am pretty sure he has a perfect idea of who you now are.
But, if you want to take a safer approach to get him to notice you, you and your roommate should team up to talk to his group of friends and ask if they know what club is popping that night. Of course, you better go to the same club they are going to because this information is like your golden ticket to the Wonka Factory—or better yet to his factory of six packs. If he sees two cute girls talking to his boys he’s going to want to get in on that conversation. But don’t give him eye contact right away, wait until he introduces himself. Most likely he may be shy and if he is, then at least getting close with his buddies is one step closer to breaking the ice with him.
–Sharon
For next week’s theme, Valentine’s Day aka the day where all single people will sneak in a bottle of wine at the movies and get wasted while eating the box of chocolates they bought for themselves, Sharon, along with various writers who are both single and in relationships will be answering questions on how to get him the perfect gift, how to spice up your relationship on this steamy holiday and whether f*ckboys truly deserves some heart-shaped candy.
Whatever the case may be, submit your questions to hercampusfsu1@gmail.com stating your first name, last name, first initial and age by midnight this Thursday, Feb. 4. If you would like to be published anonymously, we can do that as well. Just ask when you submit! The first three people to submit questions will receive a free beauty product, which may come in handy on Valentine’s Day to seduce your S.O.
Remember, girls and guys are encouraged to send in questions, so stop swiping right and ask away!
*Names have been changed to protect identity.