I’m one of the most gung-ho people you’ll meet at Emory. I do my best to promote its pros, and rationally discuss its cons. During Dooley’s Week, when the Student Concerns sub-conference comes up in the Dooley’s Week Conference, I try to post something I like, and do my best to roll my eyes and move past the sillier complaints (toilet paper? Really?).
However, there is one underlying reason for many people’s complaints, and that can be summed up quite simply: socially, Emory is just allllllll over the place. There are several ways to define that. There are people who are friendly and social, but don’t really get proper social cues; there are people who are painfully shy, and camp out at the library; there are people in fraternities and sororities who either wear an inappropriate amount of neon clothing (guilty) or you meet them and say, “You’re Greek?” In any event, below is a list of people you’re likely to cross at Emory. There are of course other people out there: the true brainiacs, the hipsters, the theater kids, the music kids, the New Yorkers…but not everyone can make the list. Besides, we’re trying to be a bit more inclusive here. We have friends we love who fit into these categories, and we have people we don’t love so much in them as well. But I promise that, by the end of your four years at Emory, you’ll know someone in each and every category.
1. The Suddenly Cool Frat Guy
Seriously, who is this guy? You know for a fact he is just like everyone else at Emory—probably a normal, occasionally cool, occasionally goofy kid in high school, who floate
d around but had a solid group of friends, who was, for all accounts, just a normal guy. But then what happened? He came to Emory and he joined a fraternity. That’s what happened. Suddenly he has a house. That means he can do whatever he wants because when people come over, they’re in his house. Suddenly he is not the goofy, friendly guy you knew from high school, from first semester of freshman year. No, no—suddenly, he is fratastic. A frat star. Suddenly, he is no longer the goofy guy friend but the fratty guy friend. And heads up: we liked the former.
2. The Is-She-Or-Isn’t-She Sorority Girl
The sorority girl is a varied one. There are es
sentially three types: the “sororstitute,” who wears her letter shirt, her letter bag, her letter flip flops, her letter zip-up, all in varying shades of neon. She might be a stereotype of her sorority, she might be a frat fan (you know, all her friends are in that frat right there. It’s like her second home!). The second is the girl you look at and say, “You’re in a sorority?” They show no signs of sorority involvement and only show up to formal. Then there are those in-between, the girls who are kind of involved, kind of wear stuff, and you don’t judge them for it. Sorority interest decreases as the women get older, which just makes recruitment all the more draining. But at the end of the day, the letters on the bag don’t make a cool person lame, or a lame person cool.
3. The Pre-Professional Punk
First they were pre-med. Then it was too hard. Then they took every single b-school prerequisite in a year. Then they schlepped through Goizueta. Then they took b-law and now want to go to law school. Then everyone else looked at them and said, “Really… there are other jobs out there. Just FYI.”
4. The Cultural Embracer
Hillel. Asian Student Alliance. Christian Fellowship. Anime Club. Arab Culture Association. ICE. Chinese Calligraphy. These are people who have embraced their culture, their religion, their cultural hobbies, and are proud of it. You can learn a lot from them…but sometimes you might feel bummed when you realize you don’t really fit into any of them at all. Like people whose ancestors came to America on the Mayflower and can’t even say they’re half Irish or half German anymore (or Native American, for that matter).
5. The Next President of the United States
We may not be Georgetown, but we’ve definitely got our fai
r share of politically minded individuals. Whether it’s SGA or CC, whether it’s the College Republicans or the College Democrats, whether it’s the political science or American studies majors, there are a lot of people with a pointed interest in policy, politics, and law. It’s not everyone’s cup of tea, of course, and sometimes they unintentionally make you feel bad when you realize that their home page is nytimes.com or cnn.com (hey, mine is Yahoo!, so I’m halfway there…right?), or you are in class with them and they start citing obscure international agreements, WTO cases, and the current hostage situation in Kosovo. Just brush it off and try to land on a movie you both might have seen, like Runaway Jury. (Which I watched for John Cusack. But they don’t have to know that.)
6. The B-Schooler
College students can’t quite put their finger on one exact reason why they are at odds with B-schoolers. Maybe it’s the four-day week, capped by a kegger. Maybe it’s
all the complaining about b-law and all the group projects (before you realize they can barely write an essay). Some say they are materialistic and cutthroat and only care about money. The B-schoolers retaliate by reminding the College student they have a job next year, which they got back in November, which is also with Deloitte. The College kid replies that at least they maintained their integrity and their soul. And the endless debate between money vs. happiness continues.
7. The One Who is Pre-Med
The other student always at odds with others, the Pre-Med Guy is the one you hear complaining about her three labs, her extra curricular activities with ChEmory, her 95 when she should have gotten a 98 (the worst). On the one hand, they are the serious Emory students, because… being pre-med at Emory is no cakewalk. On the other hand, they are entitled and turn their nose up at legitimately every other major outside of NBB, bio, or chemistry. Sometimes they’re awkward. Then they moan about how it is just so incredibly hard. Guess what? We get it. Never did I ever say being pre-med wasn’t hard. But you know what? My 30-page paper was no easy feat either. We’re all in this together, man: no pain, no gain. Let’s be real: who here doesn’t have that attitude?
8. The Student Athlete
The Student Athlete is a mysterious figure. Clearly they are serious about both academics and their sports, playing in the D-3 field. When you chance upon them in class, or the few that
might be in other clubs or in Greek life, you appreciate them and their coolness. But that chance is slim. The demands of playing a sport and balancing Emory academics can’t be an easy one, so the Student Athlete is essentially part of a family—his athletic one. If you can manage to pull him away from his swimmer buddies, her crewmates, his baseball bros, her basketball gals, hold on tight. They’re cool; don’t let go!
9. The Day (and Night) Planner
You know this kid. He’s the one who is always in competition with you. It does not matter if it is academic or extra curricular; he is, simply put, always saying, “I’m so busy.” “I have four meetings in a row.” “I won’t be back until midnight at least.” “I am just so involved.” He probably wants to join a secret society. He probably over-exaggerates the amount of work he does within his clubs. He is competitive, and he always wants to win. Even if you express zero interest in this war against busy schedules, he will constantly remind you how busy he is, how little sleep he gets, and how hard it is to trim his resume to just one page.
10. The Hidden Gem
Hey everyone, guess what! Our campus is populated with incredibly cool people! The ones you know yourself and think, “I wish everyone knew how awesome s/he was.” Sometimes they are very apparent in their coolness; sometimes they are incredibly under the radar. In any event, reach out to the kid next to you! Sometimes the quiet library-goer is really interesting; sometimes the kid who goes out six days a week is actually driven and intelligent. You never know who is out there unless you realize that a simple hello is all you need to break the ice—and we all know that mustering up the courage to break the ice first is the hardest thing. So next time you pass up someone you might have spoken to drunkenly and you aren’t sure they remember you so you walk past them without waving—wave! Sure, you feel like a douche when they ignore you, but whatever, the joke’s on them—you’re the one being friendly and getting the practice in real life. The guy who sits next to you in Italian class might be an incredible charmer; the girl who is in your psychology class might be have lived in Europe for a decade. Once we get in the habit of it, we can maybe—maybe—move past the whole “it’s so hard to find someone to date” thing we got going on. Have no fear!
BONUS: THE ONE I DID NOT MEET
The Cute Guy at the Library You See and Think, “Where have you been?”
Seriously, where have you been? And why aren’t you stationary? You are moving to other corners of the library. You are tall and look athletic. Why don’t I ever see you outside of the library? Why do you always hide in corners in the library? Sad.
What do all of these people have in common? They are all appropriately nerdy—and most of them don’t embrace it. Let’s face it: we’re at Emory University, which means we’ve pushed ourselves further, we’ve got big dreams for the future, and generally have a plan that, while subject to change en route, has a relatively definite destination (personal success, to define loosely). I learned really quickly to embrace my inner Geek (ask any of my friends what I dressed up as for Dooley’s Ball 2011) and have been flying high since then. Not immediately painting yourself as someone more worthwhile than someone else won’t do you any favors, especially here. Not everyone is going to get along, and not everyone is destined to be friends—that’s a fact of life. But come on now…everyone at least deserves a shot. You never know—maybe the kid next to you in Econ who sleeps through it every day is, in fact, a Hidden Gem.
Laugh at yourself. Embrace yourself. And embrace that all early on.