Flowers are blooming. Birds are chirping. Occupy Lilly is in full swing and has never smelt worse or been hotter… and those loincloth, sized towels just aren’t cutting it. Yes, it is time for spring break, or as we like to call it S’preak 20doez. Follow this advice and steps to make the most out of your spring break:
1. What to put in your suitcase you may ask? Anything and everything that fits under the category of “tight and bright”. Or, if you haven’t tanned or toned yourself, you may want to stick to something all black. It both slims and attracts the sun… multi-tasking at its finest.
2. Maximize your time in the car. Whether you are traveling to Panama City, Gulf Shores, Daytona, or Nana’s house car rides can get monotonous. Stock up on magazines, swipe up all of your sorority’s food stash, and bring that pillow pet along for the ride too. Realistically, you’re not going to get much homework done, so download some episodes of your favorite show… go easy on the Law & Order SVU, for fear it might come true on a friend spring break.
3. Find a hottie with a beach body, because you won’t find any here. Attract the beach bros by throwing the occasional football, running on the beach, and flipping your hair obnoxious amounts time while sunbathing. Stray away from the zinc on your nose.
4. Bond with your friends. But not too much, because once you get back, you’ll all be sick of each other. Things you can do: games (open to interpretation), show off your culinary skills and make a group meal, and don’t forget the infamous “never have I ever”.
5. Survive! You are in for a long, literally heated week. Take advantage of this break, because once you get back, you’re in for a long 6-week stretch.