If I were to describe my experience gaming online it would be as complicated as the math problem with the two trains heading in opposite directions, going different speeds and arriving at different destinations. It’s a multistep answer, but an answer nonetheless.
I have been playing video games since I was very young. My gaming career started with Super Nintendo and Nintendo 64 playing Mario games side by side with my guy relatives and friends. So, I’m used to being a minority and pretending to ignore gross, weird and often sexist comments. In fact, I often don’t notice it because it happens so often, and the people who usually say them are single, immature and they usually aren’t very good at video games.
I currently am a proud owner of a PlayStation4 and Xbox 360. I also do a little PC gaming, but usually it’s CIV5 and me yelling at computers invading my territories. When people find out that I’m a girl gamer, I never know what to expect. I never straight out tell people online because I find it invasive. However, when someone says my actual name, or I start laughing, it’s kind of obvious that I am girl. Oh, well. I’ll live.
Anyway, here are the types of guys I meet while gaming online. This is obviously generalized but most males fit somewhere below.
The Nonbelievers
These people are usually the ones that ask if I’m a girl and then bombard me with “Are you sure?”, “No, you sound like you’re 12” and “There’s no way you’re a girl”. These are also the people that are between ages 13 to 19 and are usually the hardest to convince. Eventually, I say, “What teenage boy admits that he’s a girl” which is usually met with “true, true, alright, you’re a girl”. This truly brings tears to my eyes because I was able to make someone see who was blind for so long. I can really tell he has changed because he usually says beautiful things to me such as “You know, you’re not bad for a girl”. Thank you, DankBalz69.
The “I Don’t Want to be Sexist” Lads
These people are probably my favorite to talk to because it feels like they think they are going to trigger me or I’m going to get offended by what they are going to say next. They think they are doing me a favor by prefacing me. They also say that they aren’t trying to be sexist right after they learn I am a female. Also, many of their comments aren’t sexist. They are just plain stupid, random or sometimes entertaining.
They say things like, “Women have a higher chance of getting raped because they have a really strong lower body strength while men have more upper body strength.” I never said they made any sense. Other phrases include, “Wow, you are actually really normal and funny compared the crazy sexists out there” and my personal favorite “I’m not trying to be sexist, but when women have their periods I think there should be a ‘jail’ type place where they just go and wait until their periods are over.”
There you have it. A jail for women just for being women. I love it. Can’t wait, until he runs for mayor. He did end it with “…again, not trying to be sexist or mean, but it could be a mandatory spa or something.” So, he clearly wasn’t trying to be sexist. They will often send you friend requests and then invite you everyday for the rest of your life to join them in a game.
The Boyfriends and Husbands
These are often time the greatest people to game with. The demographic is usually 24 years old and up with nothing rude to say. When they find out I’m a girl they usually say “Oh, cool!” or “nice” or “It’s refreshing to have a girl on here.” Some say they have been trying to get their wives or girlfriends to play and even ask my opinion of games that are couple friendly. Some even suggest double date gaming! I have noticed when their significant others hear that another female is playing they usually grab the mic and demand and that they play. You meet people like that occasionally, so I enjoy the time we get to play together.
The Bad, the Rude and the Lonely
These guys are the immature lonely gamers that behave like animals as soon as they hear a girl online. Their insults are only funny to them and they are the ones that get reported. These are the people who are drunk at 2 p.m. and don’t shower for weeks. Their primary goal is to break records or beat games. They view themselves as the high and mighty, even though they usually have the lowest self-esteem. Their comments are usually degrading and resentful. Plenty of “make me sandwich”, “that’s what she said” and other crude and inappropriate suggestive comments. My best advice to avoiding them is blocking them, muting the microphone and most importantly, reporting them. Getting into an argument is what they look for so I would recommend against it.
The Bodyguards
These are the guys that if anyone tries to insult you or harass you in the game, they guys defend your honor. Let’s say if player one team kills you, these guys will in return kill player one every round so he doesn’t get to play. Some are more vocal and say things like “Dude, I wouldn’t be talking” or just starts swearing back and puts player 1 into place. They then apologize and say, “He’s a jerk and he ruins the fun.” The best Bodyguards are the one that stand up for you even when you don’t feel attacked or don’t even realize what was said. They will also friend you in the game, but you will probably never play with them again. A good amount of gamers that fit here have a history in serving in the military and they are usually very down to earth.
The Simple Gamers
Most people you will meet do not care what gender is playing. They are there to play the game and that’s it. They want to talk about the game and not gender politics. These people are also nice to play with because they try to include everyone in their team. Often, Simple Gamers stick together. So, if you come across one, he will probably introduce you to the rest of the Simple Games in the team.
There is only a small amount of people, you will meet, that will make the game unpleasant. As a girl who has been gaming for years, I have a group of people that I play with and it gets bigger and bigger the more I play. Fortunately, the gaming world is so diverse, that it really comes down to you to have fun. Sooner or later you won’t pay attention to the people that aren’t pleasant. Don’t be afraid to try a game that has a stereotypical to all male or all female demographic. A girl can have as much fun playing Call of Duty as any guy. You should game for you, and not for anyone else. Good luck and happy gaming!
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