My take on some basic errors in thinking, based on a basic human desire: sex!
Top 5 Truths to remember
Connections are made!
No matter whether you’re just fuckin’ or you’re falling for someone, once you get naked in a state of relative sobriety and experience mutual pleasure, it’s an uncontrollable human reaction to consequently have a connection with the person. Dammit, oxytocin.
It’s not always great!
When it isn’t it’s totally chill to step back, put your clothes on, take a moment to yourself, or if you want to: leave! If your just not that into it, don’t worry about it!
Communication is key
There’s no such thing as overcommunicating or killing the vibe or asking too many questions or having too many rules or specifications. Consent is included in this. Communication in all interpersonal relationships is the basis of success.
Sex is different if your genders are the same
The connection often is stronger yet softer, safe but still thrilling, super hot in a way that is different than with guys. If you’ve slept with guys and get with a girl for the first time, don’t be afraid to experience every part of it in its variations!
Sex can be actually dirty! (But it’s okay)
Sometimes you need a shower after, sometimes there’s goo running from you, often you need a towel afterwards, usually there’s sweat and even tears. Sometimes blood too. Keep a towel handy – it happens to everyone.
Top 5 Myths to bust
Condoms ruin everything in every way
There are so many layers to this but I’ll try to get through them quickly. Condoms don’t ruin the vibe when you have to put one on. You think a guy is gonna go soft in the 5 seconds it takes to get the condom on that symbolizes getting to fuck you? Wrong. Condoms just keep things clean and safe. The same goes with dental dams. It’s so much easier to relax when you feel safe!
The more people you sleep with the more of your self-respect is lost.
Think about this. Is there any logical way that this makes sense? You’re having a good, natural, naked time with someone you trust. People have been going at it forever. This logic is stupid.
If you dress “promiscuously” you’re seeking sex.
Don’t feed into rape culture with this approach. Instead, dress to feel good about and express yourself. Your clothes will never be a reason for someone to think they’re allowed to fuck you.
(When a guy is involved)
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Men always cum
It is possible to have great fulfilling sex for both parties where the guy doesn’t ejaculate or orgasm!
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Sex is over when the guys cums
No matter what, if you’re a participant you get a say in this situation. You feel like you’ve had enough sex and you’re good for now? Let your partner know!
Finally, don’t forget:
Be safe, considerate, and loving. Always.
Photo by @matheusferrero on Unsplash