Moving away from home and leaving people behind is a struggle, no matter who you are. But how do you factor in issues that come with a long-distance relationship? According to three Concordia students in long-distance relationships, maintaining long-distance relationships are much easier than you think, if you keep these five ideas in mind.
1. Communication
In a recent American study published in the Journal of Communication, researchers asked 63 college-aged heterosexual couples, who either lived together or were currently in a long-distance relationship, to record one week of interactions with their significant other. The study found that couples in long-distance relationships, despite the physical distance, engaged in more meaningful conversations than couples who spoke every day.
Communication can make long-distance an amazing way to connect with the person you love, and can make your time apart a little more bearable.
Rebecca: “Even though the person is not tangible, you need to have real communication through the fake medium of the digital platform. Having honest conversations allows the person to impact you, and creates a connection from a distance.”
2. Appreciate the beauty of the mundane
Being an active part of your significant other’s life is great way to diminish the distance. You could send your partner a text every day to check in. Let them know about even extremely mundane things that happened to you. It can be anything to keep your partner a part of your day.
An extension of this can be enjoying something that reminds you of them. There is comfort in the familiar, and finding things that remind you of your partner can make that person feel much closer.
Riley: “Keeping an open dialogue throughout the day helps too, even if it’s just checking in real quick to let each other know how the day is going. Any little bit of normalcy like that helps make it feel like I’m a part of his every day, and not actually so far away.”
3. Trust
Trusting your partner is extremely important in any relationship. But in a long distance relationship, it is especially crucial. Since you can’t see your partner every day, and consequently can’t know who they see and what they do, it is even easier to feel jealous. Communication can also play an important role here, talking about insecurities and keeping an honest and open dialogue keeps trust intact.
Riley: “I have complete trust in him. I know that [my partner] would never do something to jeopardize the trust we have in our relationship. I’ve seen it happen with other couples in the same situation where one of them is too hung up on what the other person is doing, to the point where they lose trust in their partner with no probable cause”
4. Remember
No matter your situation, remember what made you want to stay with this person despite the distance. Whether it was for a change of scenery, a better education or more opportunities, you chose your situation for a reason. Never lose sight of all the great things about where you are in life.
Louise: “It is not about making it work, you know deep down if you want to be with this person… It may sound cheesy but I think that long distance can only work if you know it is worth being a part for so long”
Long distance can be difficult at times, and it is easy to feel discouraged when you’re far away from the person you love. According to Statisticsbrain.com, 40 per cent of long distance relationships end in a break-up, which are pretty good odds. If you keep these five guidelines in mind, your relationship can have a chance of going the distance and could come out stronger on the other side.