Long distance relationships are tough, but they’re not all that bad, and they can even be great when you’re with the right person. Take it from someone who made a California to New York relationship work out—you might be missing your significant other* pretty badly right now, but trust me, if you’re both willing to commit to long distance, it’s worth it. Even the things about long distance that seem like downsides have major upsides!
The downside: You can’t see each other in person :(
The upside: Only being able to talk to each other without any of the physical stuff really forces you to get to know each other on a deeper emotional level. You’ll learn things about the other person that you might never have an opportunity to talk about otherwise.
The downside: Not being able to see each other in person also means you can’t do any of the physical stuff…**
The upside: Nothing’s hotter than a deprived we-haven’t-seen-each-other-in-three-months hook up ;)
**Feel free to try out phone sex, which I guess could either be hot or awkward. However, I wouldn’t recommend Skype sex—you just don’t want to run the risk that you’ll be recorded doing something you wouldn’t want the whole Internet to see. Even if you think your significant other would never record you, there are computer viruses out there that allow third parties to see you through your webcam.
The downside: All your friends have partners who go to the same college. Wouldn’t it be nice if you both went to the same school?
The upside: You know how your friends at college with significant others are always complaining that their relationships are stagnant, they never go on dates anymore, and all they do with their partners is homework? Well, when you get to see your significant other, it’s always a special occasion. You also don’t have to deal with any of the awkward overlapping (or not overlapping) friend-group drama. Furthermore, being college students, we’re all busy, which can lead to some same-school partners feeling neglected. Of course it sucks that you can’t see each other as often in a long-distance relationship, but you also have more time to devote to yourself.
Extra perks of long-distance:
- It’s like going to two different colleges with all the benefits of both! Plus, it feels like a vacation every time you get a chance to visit. Your partner’s school will start to feel like a second home away from home.
- You’ll never take a moment you spend together for granted, because every time you see each other feels special.
- If you’re able to successfully navigate a healthy long-distance relationship, you develop a profound sense of trust and security in each other. If your relationship passes this test, you’ll both be stronger for it and you’ll be equipped to get through any rocky patches together.
*In an effort to be inclusive to readers everywhere along the gender and sexuality spectrums, this article uses terms such as “significant other” and “partner” in place of more cis/heteronormative terms like “boyfriend” or “girlfriend.” So go out and love whomever you want to!