You’ve made it! That light you saw at the end of the tunnel is finally here, and you couldn’t be happier to embark on a much needed break. Let’s be honest, ever since Halloween you’ve been riding the almost-break-train – an express route to turkey, stuffing, and the all-you-can-eat gravy boat. Well, welcome to the good times, but sit tight. As much as you yearned for this #thankful break, you neglected to remember the inevitable baggage that comes with those long distance relatives. That’s right, Aunt Sally is coming with her Wall Street wannabe boyfriend, Uncle Bob is bringing yet another “girl of his dreams,” and Cousin Karlie just returned from her first semester of college with a new attitude (emphasis on tude).
Here to help you along those trying turkey times is the Trainwreck-star herself, Amy Schumer.
So, when Aunt Lorraine asks you about your new beau…
Tears, baby, tears. Works everytime.
When Uncle Dave asks what the job prospects are after graduation in May…
Have you heard? Unemployed is the new black. Or maybe the red.
When Gammy tells you to help yourself to seconds…
That New Years Eve dress will fit eventually, no?
Then, when you’ve hit up thirds, fourths, and perhaps even the reluctant fifths…
No one ever said it was a bad one.
And how about that Cousin Karlie, back from college and ready to show you how lit freshman year is…
Never grow up, never get old.
Happy Thanksgiving y’all. Remember: smile through the painful conversation, drink through the endless life questions, and when all else fails – eat enough turkey to take that well deserved mid-dinner nap!