On March 10th, 2016, I officially withdrew from UC Davis. Five (very blurry) days later, I submitted my application to CLU. You’ve heard me say it before, but I’ll say it again: As rushed as that decision was, it was and always will be, the best decision I’ve made thus far, and as my first semester comes to a close in just a few short days, I felt compelled to reflect on what has made the last four months so beautiful:
On my first day back in a school setting, I was genuinely nervous; more than I have ever been for anything. I didn’t know how to feel that first day. Truthfully, however, it was quite easy for me to assimilate and get back in the groove because as soon as I came on campus as a full-fledged student, I felt incredibly relaxed and like everything would be okay. I knew that the worst was behind me, so now all I had to do was focus on building myself up again. As I sat in my 9 AM Environmental Ethics class, I started to feel like myself again and it wasn’t because I had a pen and paper in front of me. It was because the people around me had a genuine kindness that was so effortlessly present.
Over the course of this semester, I have watched myself grow in ways I never imagined I could. I made an entire group of friends in my mid-afternoon poetry class that I can open up to, poetically or otherwise, about anything and everything. I joined Her Campus, a group with more than 100 inspiring, gorgeous women who have brought me out of my shell and shown me that there are good people in the world. I have become stronger at articulating the things I can’t understand and asking for help when I need it most without feeling ashamed or embarrassed. Most importantly, though, I have learned to trust myself more after feeling “beat down” for so long. I believe that’s the biggest revelation I’ve had since coming here: this school allows you to become whoever you want to be, regardless of your past mistakes and hardships.
This first semester at CLU brought me many new friends, colleagues and mentors, but it’s also brought back my confidence and shown me that I have always been fearless. I just needed to be in the right place at the right time to see it. For that, I am forever grateful and I cannot wait to see what 2017 brings me at this beautiful place.