I know, I know how cliché of me to say “love yourself.” How many times has your mom said to love yourself?
“Be confident in yourself because, honey you are so great and there is no one like you.”
We have all gotten that speech from someone, some time in our young life. But hey, it is honestly true if you take a moment to think about it.
We are in our 20’s and these years we will experience some of the best and, unfortunately, some of the worst of times. Just like T Swift said, “we’re happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time.”
In our most exciting and exhilarating moments take everything in, along with our bad moments. Experience all that life is offering you, find a lesson in each day and allow yourself to grow from it. Stop sheltering your mind because you are scared to learn something new about yourself.
Take a spontaneous road trip with your best friend and realize where you belong because right now you are living for yourself.
Let go of that relationship that is no longer healthy because you are afraid that you may be losing “the one”. I promise you, if you are meant to be with that person you will be together one day.
Shake off that test that you failed, honestly it is OKAY. You are human and we all have our imperfections even if grandma tries to tell us that we don’t. Accept your defeats but embrace your successes.
Go out to pints on Tuesday even though you have an 8 am tomorrow. You do not have to get rip roaring drunk, but take too many selfies with your girlfriends, blow up instagram because you are feeling hot and go to class the next day with tired eyes but a night full of memories.
These are the years we truly should be finding ourselves. Embrace who you really want to be, and do not let anyone tell you otherwise.
Do what YOU want to do, dammit.
The best advice that I have gotten since being away at college is this: This is the only time in our lives that we can be selfish. Seriously, think about it. In a few years you will graduate, find a career, and most likely be married with a child on the way. As great as that life will be when it arrives, lets seize the freedom that we have right now and use it as a time to yes, fall in love with ourselves.
Stop, for just a moment.
Stop worrying about what so and so would think if you made this decision. Stop thinking you look too fat in that new dress and what that cute guy in your Chem lab would think if he saw you. Stop planning your life around what your mom and dad believe is best for you. Stop erasing that text message and just press send. Stop putting off applying for that internship because you might have to move away. Stop being scared of change and most of all stop telling everyone else that you love them, and tell yourself.
Far too often we are constantly doing what makes everyone else happy. We find ourselves saying, “well if I can make them happy and if everyone around me is happy with whom I am and what I am doing then I guess that I am too.” No, you are lying to yourself. That is not possible.
Trust me, I have been there. We all have been there at sometime or another because we are too afraid of hurting the ones that we love, and yes this is a great moral to have, but have you ever realized that a lot of the time you are hurting YOURSELF?
It is a long process and a hard habit to break but you owe it to yourself to give it a try. How many times are you going to forgive your “friend” for betraying you? How many times are you going to date the wrong guy and regret it after? How many times are you going to let your boss be a total bitch and go home that evening with so much anger built inside?
You give countless chances to everyone in your life, and yet, you don’t give yourself a single one.
How unfair.
Remember in elementary school, on the first day when your teacher would hand out the sheets of paper that asked you questions about yourself? The questions were anywhere from, what do you want to be when you grow up? What makes you happy? To, if you could have any super power what would it be? Back then those questions seemed to be so simple.
Over the years we have allowed those questions to get so blurry because we no longer know the answers. Because when those questions come up nowadays you take into consideration your boyfriend, your best friend, your parents, your social status, your physical appearance, and even all of your self-doubts and insecurities.
But you rarely take into consideration, what you want.
Remember answering those questions back then? It was so easy to say what you wanted to be when you grew up, you were so excited to share with the classroom what your dreams were. Because then, anything and everything seemed possible.
But guess what? NOTHING ABOUT THE WORLD HAS CHANGED.
You have.
You let everything else in your life get in front of you. Everything else suddenly became so much more important than you. I hate when people say.. “I have not changed I have just grown up.”
What in the world is grown up about not following your dreams? What is grown up about taking the easy route? What is grown up about allowing your doubts and insecurities to override your positives? What is grown up about now being brave, and not taking risks, and chances anymore?
I think we were more grown up when we were children. Everyone always says, “lets go back to the good old days, I was so happy when I was a kid.”
Because you loved yourself. Because back then no one told you that you weren’t supposed to love yourself, no one made you believe that that was selfish.
So I say be a little kid again when you believed that the world was really at your fingertips and you could be anything you wanted to be. Because I promise you that you still can be whatever you want to be, because now the world truly is at our fingertips but we are too scared to grab it.
Stop making lists in your phone about what you are going to do and just do it. Yes you will have hardships. Yes you will have your heart broken. Yes you will fail. Yes you will cry.
But if you go back to kindergarten and look at life with that mind set and never give up and begin to follow your dreams again, begin to believe that you are special, remember that you deserve so much more, and realize that you fell out of love with yourself, your life will start to turn around.
You will have wonderful breathtaking life changing moments. You will succeed. You will smile. Most importantly you will fall in love. With YOU.