In today’s digital age, texting, email, and other forms of message exchange have almost antiquated the art of face-to-face, sharing-the-same-air communication. Where in the past, reading a person’s mood or personality could be done through his/her body language, today it comes largely through punctuation and emoji-usage. According to a Gallup poll, texting is the most prevalent form of communication for Americans under the age of 50. Put it this way: will you notice if the friend you’re talking to has her arms crossed? Maybe. But will you pick up on (and possibly panic over) her one-word, period-punctuated text replies? Without a doubt.
Among the many social constructs that have been modified by the digital age is flirtation. Back when boys used to flirt primarily by offering a friendly “hey” in person, there was no frenzied debate about his extra “y” (“heyy”) and what it meant. Real-life boys don’t stick out their tongues at the end of a sentence, so why (and how?!) should you interpret his “:P”? Yes, modern collegiettes may find it easier to play it cool communicating with guys from behind a keyboard. But are we spending too much time interpreting 140-character texts and not enough time actually listening to what others have to say?
Consider how this interpretation craze affects us as a generation. The more time we spend racking our brains with whether to type back “haha” or “hahaha,” the less time we spend actually communicating — which, in theory at least, is why we text people in the first place. We get so caught up in the minutiae of our messages that we lose the ability to let conversation flow organically. Professor Janet Sternberg of Fordham University conducted a study on the effects of texting on communication: frighteningly, she found that more and more students are struggling to make eye contact and execute other basics of direct, face-to-face communication. These skills are vital for building sound relationships, nailing job interviews, and showing respect to others. The thought of developing into a generation that fails at these basic tasks is alarming, indeed.
Think also about what our symbol-obsessed mentality means for how we perceive other people as a whole: The guy who uses too many emojis? He’s probably really feminine. That girl who ends every sentence with a period? What a b*tch. He read your text but didn’t respond yet? He’s clearly uninterested, seeing someone else, and just wants you to leave him alone. All these preconceptions that are subconsciously collected with each whistle of your iPhone and can create a warped perception of who another person really is. You may never get past his constant hammering on the crying-from-laughter emoji key to see that you both have the same sense of humor. You may badmouth punctuation-girl to your friends before getting to know her warm and easygoing personality. You may write off the cute boy with his read receipts on, when in actuality, he forgot to reply to your text because he stopped to pet someone’s dog.
All the interpreting and assuming we do when communicating with others is exactly why older generations criticize millennials for being so absorbed in technology. We have to try to start taking text messages for what they are: messages. Not personalities, not conversations, not real, natural, engaging interactions between two individuals. Certainly, text messages are useful, but a text is not the be-all-end-all of a person’s character. Daring to look beneath the emojis may reveal much more than meets the eye.
Sources:
http://www.gallup.com/poll/179288/new-era-communication-americans.aspxhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/03/text-messaging-texting-conversation_n_1566408.html