Apartment life always seemed like this beautiful mirage on the horizon of teenage life, beckoning to the adulthood beyond. Picking out furniture, cooking meals, inviting friends over to admire the splendor of this place that is all yours. Also, if Miranda Cosgrove could handle it on iCarly then you definitely could too.
And at first, it is easy. The whole family comes to move you in, you stock your fridge and cupboards on mom’s dime, you and your roommates are religiously sticking to the cleaning schedule you made up – pretty much everything short of a heavenly chorus descending to bless your humble abode, your first real home-away-from-home.
As the weeks pass, however, things start to feel less than idyllic. Your small female neighbor upstairs mysteriously transforms into an elephant the moment you try to fall asleep, sounding like she’s throwing entire pieces of furniture around. You get hungry an hour before class – the class that now takes twice as long to get to now that you’re not on campus – and have to scrounge for a meal. And, speaking of food, it now costs actual dollars and cents to be well fed every week.
There’s no RA to talk to about the noise. There’s no dining hall to turn to when your stomach starts rumbling. You’re no longer guaranteed a meal with the swipe of a card. You’re responsible for yourself in the way that you thought you would be the first time you said goodbye to home and hello to college in the big city of Boston, and it’s a more-than-a-little-bit-scary wake up call.
Last year’s tiny dorm room isn’t looking so bad anymore.
But there’s something so exhilarating about unlocking that door to your apartment after class every day, even if the dishes are piled up in the sink and you maybe might have seen a cockroach crawl under your oven that one time (Fingers crossed it was only a really big ant!). You get to sit down at your desk. Yes, it might be a thrift store find that doesn’t match with all of the other furniture in the room, but it’s yours to customize as you wish. You get to eat food that you and your roommates made. Though these meals may not have fancy cream sauces served in rectangular-octagonal-hexagonal dishes, they’re your very own homemade creations (albeit a little burnt sometimes). Most importantly, you get to come and go as you please with whomever you’re with without having to worry about swiping anyone in or having ID cards held ransom.
The responsibility and independence that comes with having a place of your own can be empowering, and it’s important to remember that when the schoolwork is piling up and you still have to make yourself food and – oops! It’s also your turn to clean the bathroom this week! Dealing with all of this is part of adult life, and learning early on how to juggle competing obligations puts you at an advantage. Embrace the feeling that comes with decorating, maintaining, and loving a place that is all your own and you will be a stronger person, prepared for anything the universe might hurl at you.
So count your blessings, folks in West and Warren and Towers and everywhere else. Dorm life oftentimes seems more oppressive and unfortunate than it really is. But don’t be afraid to take that big leap off campus either! It’s overwhelming at times, but it’s a truly wonderful learning experience that can challenge and surprise you.