The relationships that men and women have in America are by no means perfect, but the outward interactions men and women have, especially in public places, are usually ones of respect. This is an underecognized privilege that I am now certainly aware of after spending time in the Dominican Republic, where “machismo” has a strong influence on the culture.
Growing up as a young woman in America certainly has its obvious privileges. Not only do we have a great deal of equality, but women in this country achieve at all levels in society. With a femal Secretary of State, numerous female Nobel Prize winners and CEOs of major companies, it seems as though American women can do anything. We are all incredibly lucky to live in a country that has come to value the role that women play in contributing to the world in a meaningful way. However, upon a recent visit to the Dominican Republic, I realized that not all countries have the level of respect and appreciation that the United States has for women.
From the moment I stepped off the plane in the Dominican Republic I was bombarded by men offering to carry my suitcases. After declining several offers, to which I received nasty looks and shaking heads in return, I lugged my fifty-pound suitcase to the front of the airport, where I met my good friend, and we headed to the beach. We spent four days at the beach in Juan Dolio, right outside of the city of Santo Domingo. Being at the resort offered a small glimpse at Dominican culture, however, the unequal gender dynamic was still blatantly clear. Men were dominant in every way, often talking down to their wives or girlfriends even in public. More disturbingly, many men tried to hit on other women, or made suggestive comments to passersby while their wives and children were present.
Plenty of men were constantly whistling and hissing at all women, without restraint. Even women accompanied by other men were not spared from this disrespectful attention. Dominican women did not seem bothered by this behavior, as they often just sat and watched after their children, or enjoyed the sun and sand. They seemed almost oblivious to the utter disregard their husbands and boyfriends were showing towards them. The worst was when groups of men gave women attention because it was extremely overwhelming and they would often feed off of one another’s comments and the situation would quickly escalate. After four days at the beach, I’d had enough of this behavior, but little did I know that the situation would take a turn for the worse when we headed to the city of Santo Domingo.
From the moment we first began exploring the city of Santo Domingo, I felt as though I was trapped in some sort of glass box where I was constantly being observed and objectified. Everywhere we went men would make comments, yell at us, hiss, and even follow after us. When we were crossing the street men would yell out of their car windows and honk their horns. In shops and stores men would stare at us, watching our every move, never giving us space. Even police officers made comments and stared.
When I had conversations with men, I still felt as though they didn’t care what I had to say, and that they were just concerned with my outward appearance. I quickly learned that life was easier if I wore pants instead of dresses or skirts, and as a result, I suffered through three days of temperatures in the upper 80’s wearing jeans. My good friend told me many stories of problems she has faced during her time in the Dominican, and expressed that this was certainly a culture where the idea of “machismo” was alive and thriving. One of the most striking elements of what she relayed about her experience was that the women of the Dominican did not voice any sense of discomfort or concern about the way they were treated or their inferior position in society. The women in the Dominican have to deal with the type of disrespectful behavior that I was so repulsed by on a daily basis, yet nothing is ever done about it. There is no presence of feminism in the Dominican and it seems that the machismo culture is a vicious cycle that is handed from generations of fathers to their sons. Young boys learn from the examples their father’s set, and are only encouraged by the lack of response from their mothers. It is a sad part of the Dominican culture and it’s something I never realized could be so overwhelming because I have been privileged enough to be respected by most men in this country.