Some of us are veterans of this wonderful day and some of us are newbies.
This one’s for the newbies.
The freshman..the sophomore who didn’t start drinking until this year because they were still trying to convince themselves they could have fun at a school where almost everyone drinks without drinking but finally gave into temptation..the transfer student..or the upperclassman who has clearly waited too long to experience this joyous occasion. Well, no need to worry. Lucky for you, the staff of HC Binghamton are veterans to Parade Day. So follow these tips and you’ll survive Parade Day. Don’t follow them, and, well, bad things will happen.
DO get a good night’s sleep. You’re going to need it. It’s called Parade Day because it actually lasts all day. You’ll need all the energy you can get. That means...
DON’T go out the night before. That’s silly. Trust me, we’ve done it thinking it would be just like any other weekend where we drink Thursday through Saturday with no repercussions. It’s not. This Saturday is on a whole other level. You will need stamina. You don’t want to wake up hungover on Parade Day, that part comes around 5:37 p.m. during Parade Day.
DO eat breakfast! Load up on carbs and perhaps drink a few glasses of milk to coat your stomach a bit.
DON’T have a slice of toast and call it breakfast. You will need a hearty meal, who knows when you’ll be sober enough to eat next.
DO wear green. Lots of it. This seems obvious but some people seem to be unaware of the fact that Parade Day is for St. Patrick. You have to wear green! Even if it’s your least favorite color. We go to Binghamton, it’s kind of our color, you should own at least a sock that is green.
DON’T buy St. Patty’s day stuff from street vendors. I mean I guess you can if you’d like but those things are so overpriced and you can get the same stuff at the dollar store or CVS on Court Street, where the parade will be taking place.
DO wear comfortable clothing and shoes! We should also include, a rain jacket, rain boots, and an umbrella for this year’s parade. Sadly, Mother Nature doesn’t seem to care that it’s Parade Day so she’s giving us rain showers all day. HAHA Mother Nature, we live in Binghamton. We do not fear rain. Also, you’ll probably be running all around downtown for the day so you definitely won’t want to be wearing heels or sandals or anything of the sort.
DON’T carry around stuff you don’t absolutely need. Keeping track of your belongings during an all day drunken escapade will be close to impossible. Bring only the necessities: money, BU ID, actual ID, keys, flask... Just kidding about the flask. Sort of.
DO pace yourself! This will be difficult. Drinking as much as possible the moment you wake up is silly. You’ll last until noon, max. We don’t even think the parade starts until around 1 p.m.
DON’T mix your alcohol. Mixing anything alongside an Irish car bomb is a horrible, horrible idea. You will vomit and it will probably be in public. We’re pretty sure you can get arrested for that sort of behavior. Don’t be stupid.
DO attempt to act sober when around families with young children. If you’re out on the streets where the parade is actually taking place you will definitely see lots of sweet little innocent faces out there. Let’s keep them innocent. You can even use this time to catch a glimpse of the parade. You know, since there is an actual parade going on out there.
DON’T pee in public. This one’s really for the guys. Although, we definitely know some girls that have done this before. Gross. If you find yourself doing the pee pee dance, find a bathroom! There will probably be open houses all around celebrating Parade Day and they most likely won’t even notice if you go in to use their bathroom. Also, the bars are open all day so you can use the bathrooms there as well.
DO rest for lunch and take a nap. Whether you think you need it or not, just do it. It doesn’t have to be a huge meal and you don’t have to sleep for seven hours, just one or two will do. You’ll be happier when you wake up knowing you can conquer the rest of the evening.
DON’T miss out on the night’s festivities. Most people will argue that the best part of Parade Day is the day drinking but that’s probably because most of those people have never made it to the night part of this special day. If you follow all of these rules, you will definitely make it out and it will be the cherry on top of the most perfect Parade Day sundae ever.