~We’d like to give a special thanks these brave, anonymous contributors~
“At a party, I accidentally sat down on the wooden armrest of a couch. I broke my tailbone and had to leave– it was bruised for months.”
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“Post-shower, I was dancing around with my friend in the locker room and she starting taking a snapchat video of me. Then my towel fell off.”
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“Me: ‘Hi, how are you?’
Hot guy: ‘Good, how are you?’
Me: ‘Good! How are you?
*awkward silence* ”
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“At Seasons (The 921) I reached for a plate, and a cute guy reached for the same one. He looked down and then politely said ‘Here, you can have it.’ I thanked him and picked up the plate, then realized that there was dried up leftover food smeared all over it. When the guy walked away, I turned back to put down the plate.
…He looked back at me and smiled.”
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“One time I was hooking up with a guy and he got hungry right in the middle of it, so he went to the kitchen and came back with a cup in his hand. We started hooking up again and I smelled peanut butter on his breath. I asked him what he was eating from the cup, and he replied, ‘Captain Crunch, you want some?’ He then proceeded to spit chewed-up cereal from his mouth into mine– momma/baby bird style.”
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“This kid accidentally walked into my classroom early for the next period while my class was watching a movie. He looked incredibly confused and stood frozen at the front of the room. Then, instead of leaving quietly, he walked to the back of the room and sat down on the carpet to watch the film.
…My professor ended class early.”
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“This guy I was hooking up with kept drunk texting me one night, but I really wasn’t interested. I went to bed and was woken up by him pounding at the door soon after. I didn’t want him to wake up my suitemates, so I opened the door. He stumbled in, took his clothes off, and laid in my bed demanding that I ‘be big spoon tonight.’ The next morning, he had to get back to his frat house. I offered to drive him since I needed to pick up some groceries, and he replied, ‘Oh perfect, I need stuff too!’ So I had to take my hookup grocery shopping. Worst of all, as he got out of the car at his house, he said, ‘Thanks for being a homie,” and gave me a high five.”
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“One time I was carrying a bowl of cereal with milk out of Seasons (The 921). I tripped and spilled the cereal all over the girl in front of me. I felt so bad that I started helping her pick the Frosted Flakes out of her hair. I didn’t eat Frosted Flakes for the rest of the semester.”
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“I went to a frat party on Halloween, and I was wearing high heels. As I went to go downstairs, a frat brother warned me to be careful because the stairs were slippery. I laughed and told him, ‘I got this, don’t worry,’ only to immediately fall down the entire flight. Later in the night, I was upstairs about to go down again. A different brother came over to me and said, ‘Just a precaution, some dumb girl fell down all the stairs earlier. What an idiot.’”
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“I was at a concert in Boston and really had to pee. I was way up front, and I didn’t want to lose my spot. I had the brilliant idea that if I could chug my drink, I would have the perfect container for my urine. So I chugged my drink, stuck the cup under my dress, and began to relieve myself. It was going pretty smoothly until the bottle started to overflow. I spilled pee all over my roommate’s leg, and the rest dribbled onto the floor. Suddenly I came to my senses and realized that I couldn’t just ditch this bottle of pee or pour it all onto the ground, so I raced full speed ahead to the bathroom. As I pushed past people, I heard someone ask my friends, ‘Did she just spill her beer everywhere?’”
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“One time I was trying to convince a guy to come to a party, and I knew we would be playing slap cup. I decided to challenge him to beat me in the game and told him I would definitely ‘slap his cup.’ He apparently took that to be a sexual reference and was surprised when I didn’t invite him back to my room afterward.”
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“I came to Bentley during my senior year of high school for a recruiting trip for my sport. I went to a football game with my team, and Flex was there. The seniors on the team convinced me that it was super common to go up to Flex and ask him for an autograph and a picture, so I went for it to try and fit in. Flex laughed.”
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“My best friends lived in a different Trees dorm than me freshman year, so I would always hang out in their room. I have a pretty loud voice, and I guess the girls on that floor started to notice, because they asked their R.A. to speak to me about keeping the noise down since I was a regular there.”
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