BC Student 1: “Hey, how are you?” (Doesn’t actually mean that as a question.)
BC Student 2: “Hey, good, how are you?” (Doesn’t actually stick around to hear the response.)
BC Student 1: “Good, how are you?“ (Redundant question… AWKWARD!)
Have you ever noticed this conversation pattern? I know I have. Here are a few tips to integrate small talk into your life anywhere from the steps of O’Neill to the salad bar in Lower.
Ask questions that you sincerely want to know the answer to
This is a surefire way to make sure you sound sincere in your small talk. For example, you know your friend is busy, but you still want to let her know you care, so say, “Hey, I’m just heading to the library. How was that meeting you told me about?” It doesn’t have to be a long heart-to-heart, but just hearing that someone cares enough to remember and inquire further about her endeavors will make her day!
Can’t think of anything: compliment!
“I love that sweater on you.” This is perfect for people you know well, and also people who you have never seen before. Everyone appreciates an honest compliment, and it can make the eternity of waiting in line at Eagle’s Nest pass much quicker. And you never know, you may end up with a new friend.
“Hi, I see you everywhere…”
Is there that one person, who seems to have the same schedule as you? You are practically scarfing down Honey-Q’s side by side, yet you’ve never exchanged anything but knowing glances. Initiate an interaction by calling attention to this. If you two really hit it off you may end up exchanging numbers, in addition to names!
Talk to yourself
You are probably thinking, wow, that is awful advice… how creepy? When used correctly, a poignantly placed “Do I want chicken or steak?” or “ Wow, I am so indecisive” will warrant a response like, “Oh steak for sure… that’s my favorite” or “oh my goodness, me too, I thought I was the only one who can never make a decision.” Smiling and sounding pleasant is crucial in the execution, otherwise you may just sound like you are complaining.
State the obvious
You are walking into lower, that friend of a friend’s roommate is behind you. You have always thought he seems like a nice guy, “if only we were on speaking terms…” you think to yourself. Who says you can’t be? You proceed through the first door into Lower and he is a few steps behind you. You reach for the door with your notebook and North Face in hand… “Gosh these doors are so heavy.” He responds, “I know, right?” Perfect opportunity for a compliment, “Yeah, but you look much stronger than me, so it’s probably not an issue for you.” Flirty smile. Once you’ve established a connection, it’s up to you to see where it goes.
Trying some of these tips will make your brief encounters with friends, acquaintances, and complete strangers a lot less awkward, and hey, you may gain a couple of friends along the way!
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at BC chapter.