From birth, I’ve played every sport my father could find – as soon as I learned to walk, he bought me my first soccer ball. We would spend hours in the driveway or backyard, kicking around while my mother looked on from the kitchen window, polishing her wineglasses. Personally, I think she was always jealous of my affinity to all things athletic, but eventually she became the most stylish soccer mom (no mini-van or bob required). Elementary school rolled around and I easily made friends with all the cool boys in class. Why? Because I could outrun half of them. I’m not saying you have to be strangely athletic to attract the male species, but back then it was nice to see the confused looks on the other girls’ faces when the boys invited me to play touch football at recess. Well, it was a blessing and a curse.
Growing up with a solid group of guys to pal around with has always been my undoing. In high school, when every girl was more worried about who’s talking to who or what so-and-so did at so-and so’s basement party, I learned to stay out of the pettiness like my guy friends so easily did. However, hanging out with only males (straight males, I might add) puts a hefty target for jealous cattiness on your back. Other female classmates held my friendships with the opposite sex against me for years, and some even past graduation. But here’s the thing – all that envy was a waste of time. If anything, I learned and benefitted more from being buddy-buddy with the boys than I could have ever absorbed from the snarky girls that went to my private high school.
Take notes, ladies. The male specimen can teach you a thing or two about living simply. After all, they are less than complex individuals.
Lesson One: Relax!
For some God-awful reason, women are hard wired into to constantly analyzing every aspect of life. It takes over our thoughts, no matter what it might be; your last minute outfit, the fact that you rushed out the door without a bra on (hey, it happens), or the looming chance that you run into last weekend’s hookup who likes to mark his territory (hickeys should not still be a thing). Over-analyzing is in our DNA. Guys, however, have mastered the art of – wait for it – not caring. Turning a blind eye to the haters is their forte. Rolling with the punches of your stressful everyday life can prove to be so much easier than being such a girl about it. I was afraid of running into my ex anywhere on my small campus after a recent breakup, as any red-blooded female would be. In the middle of a minor panic attack one of my guy friends grabbed my shoulders, shook me, and shouted “WHO CARES. You might see him. He’s just a dude. You’ll survive.” He was right. Take a little breather and realize that the sun will come out tomorrow after all… even if you encounter that left swipe worthy one nightstand at the coffee shop before your 9 am.
Benefit One: You’ll never be dateless.
Date functions and cocktails make single girls queasy, but with a plethora of fun guy friends to chose from, you can have a date in a snap and even set up a sister while you’re at it. From themed socials to formals, you’re guaranteed a good time with no sexpectations. They’ll drink with you, dance with you, and realize there’s nothing coming from it. A good bud is the perfect solution for being a single lady without prospects or after a nasty break up…your GBF (guy best friend) will hold your hair and listen to you cry about your ass of an ex. Honestly, there’s no reason to not harass your guy friends to be your date. It’s a privilege, really, if you think about it.
Lesson Two: Less judgment, more love.
As living, breathing, latte sipping females, we are naturally judgmental people. We judge the walk of shames, the dreadful outfit choices, and our fellow sorority girl’s actions at the bar last Friday night. The beauty of the boy is that they go through life seeing opportunities for judgment and simply pass them by. They rarely find importance in dissecting the decision making process of the normal female, as well as their fellow males. It goes back to my point about boys being carefree – judgment just isn’t first on their list of priorities. They’d rather place a bet on their next game of FIFA or pick up girls at the student rec center. So, when someone says to “think like a man”, interpret that as “take your b*tch face off and accept humanity”.
Benefit Two: He’ll introduce you to his hot friends.
Your buds have seen you at your worst, mascara running and all. Yet they still keep you around and love you for who you are. With all that brotherly love, why wouldn’t they want to set you up with their über-hott friends? They’ll introduce you, put in a good word, and voilà! New conquest! Having a group of guys to vouch for you when you’re freshly single and ready to mingle (sorry, I just couldn’t resist) is the next best thing to hunting a man on your own.
So make some (boy) friends, buckle down, and unleash your inner guy. Terrified? Don’t be! You’re on the road to super-cool-chick-dom. Embrace it, girl.