Everyday we’re faced with someone prettier, smarter or more talented than us. Jealously brews and we start to doubt ourselves or irrationally envy the other person. It’s such an easy trap to fall into and a hard habit to break, especially considering how easy social media makes it to see everyone we know thriving.
When we compare ourselves to other people- in any way- we are stunting our own growth. I’ve struggled with this my own life, so I came up with 3 ways to help break this habit. It’s not foolproof, but it’s a start.
1. Don’t reduce yourself down to a number
GPA, weight, years of experience, etc are all ways that we reduce our self worth down to a number. But you are a dimensional, complex person. You are so much more than can be summed up in any number, and itt’s important not to see these stats over people. When you see those Facebook humble brags about 4.0 GPAs and losing 15 lbs, remember the your progress isn’t always measured in numbers. It doesn’t matter if your numbers are ‘worse,’ because your growth can be measured in other ways.
2. Genuinely praise others’ success
Speaking of Facebook humble brags or even Instagram ‘thirst traps,’ try to leave positive comments. Boosting someone up can help you take the focus off of yourself. Instead of sulking in the negativity of comparisons, you’re putting some positive energy into someone else’s day. Positive actions breed positive thoughts and it’ll help direct you away from the self deprecating reactions.
3. Reflect on your past selves
A great way to measure your progress is by comparing yourself to the past versions of yourself instead of other people. It doesn’t matter if so-and-so has lost 5 inches off of their waist this year, if you feel healthier and happier than you did last year. It’s okay if you didn’t make the Dean’s List like they did, because maybe you’ve taken on a difficult internship or pushed yourself outside the classroom! Are you improving? Then that’s all that matters.
During times of insecurity and self doubt, it’s easy to fall into a black hole of comparisons. Progressing out of this may involve rewiring your reactions, but I promise it’ll make your life a little brighter.