There’s a saying that goes that in order to find your prince, you have to kiss a lot of frogs. While the use of “prince” to describe the guy you want to date is completely outdated and overrated in this day and age, “frog” still remains the perfect word to describe what can only be called “that guy.” We’ve all met one or two (or more than that for the truly unlucky), but often we don’t spot them until they have made some sort of impact on our lives. Here are some characteristics to look for the next time you meet a guy you really like, so you can spot early on the red flags.
He’s a Little Too Charming
This is the guy who always has a follow up question for you, who manages to keep the conversation flowing in a way that gets you to reveal everything about yourself, but he somehow manages to keep his own history in the dark. He sends you flirtatious texts, is always well-dressed, and seems to know everyone. This is also the guy, though, that will quickly leave you in the room to go talk to everyone else, the guy who attracts girls to him like magnets, and the guy who never seems to be capable of going beyond the hook-up stage of a relationship. Unless that is exactly what you’re looking for, ditch this guy fast, since the chances of him ever getting serious and dropping the charming facade and showing you his true self are slim to none.
He is Not Good at Communicating
By “communicating,” I mean that this is type of guy who will be sweet and lovely in person, but will then take hours to respond to even the most basic text. Their responses will be brief, and often the ball will be left in your court to make a move romantically. While this can mean that they are just not into you, it can also mean that they don’t view you as a huge part of their lives, and thus don’t feel like taking the time to respond to your texts. Save yourself the angst and the texting bills, and delete this guy from your contacts list.
People Who Know Him Don’t Say Good Things About Him
If you mention this guy to people who also know him, and you get any response similar to “oh, yeah, he’s, uh, cool, I guess, that’s good for you,” followed by a refusal by the person you are talking to to make eye contact with you, that is a huge red flag. Chances are, if you ask that person their true opinion of your guy, they’ll tell you stories they already know about him, stories about how his romantic history may not be the best. While you can’t always trust one person’s experiences with this guy, if multiple people back up these stories, it should be pretty clear that this is a guy to be avoided at all costs.
His Intentions are Unclear
If a guy likes you, and really, truly wants to make it work with you, then he will. It’s that simple. If this guy is wishy-washy, and drops leading hints about taking you on a date, or going on other outings, but never actually makes concrete plans, move on. This guy is just stringing you along, and likely doing the same to a few other girls, so he’ll always have plenty of options to help build up his ego so he can feel like he is a lot more attractive than he actually is.
You Never Feel Totally Happy Around Him
Psychology studies find that you can be attracted to a person within 2/10 of a second of making eye contact with them. However, attraction does not equal a stable future relationship, however light or serious that may be. If this guy is incredibly attractive, but you aren’t sure of yourself around him, or he almost seems to intentionlly be trying to make you uncomfortable, he is not worth one more minute. Ultimately, happiness is at the core of what everyone is seeking in life, and if this guy is too selfish about his own thoughts and feelings to spare a thought for yours, just don’t date him. There are so many more fish in the sea, and so many great guys out there to meet. Knowing that these guys actually do exist is what make having to put up with a few “frogs” worthwhile.