Broke from calling late night love lines for advice? Looking for the lowdown on the hoedown when it comes to college guys? Real Live College Guy Sean is here to help you pick apart the mind of the average college guy. Whether it’s avoiding that awkward weekend hook-up, or full-on relationship advice, Sean is here to save the day!
I started dating my boyfriend about a month ago. We have known each other for about a year and were really good friends before the relationship started. Now I know he has had sex with previous exes and likewise, he knows I’m a virgin. We’ve made out pretty hot and heavy and I can tell it’s progressing towards us having sex. He’s a gentleman about making sure I’m okay with our steps forward in the relationship, which I am, except for the sex part. I want to have sex with him… but I’m very nervous about the whole idea and actually making it happen. I’m not sure what to do about the whole thing. I’ve read all the material I can find. Is there anything else I can do? – Nervous at NC State
Hey Nervous,
Well, you’ve already done most of the work really. You’ve got the gallant collegent who understands the situation, and you’ve done your homework. All that’s left is to break out the red wine, dim the lights, and throw on some Barry White.
There’s something funny about losing your virginity that’s different between men and women. While it is a big deal to guys, for some reason, it is a much bigger deal for women. It’s not a bad thing really, and I can understand why many women care so much about it. Luckily, you’ve given it some thought and want your first time to be something special. From the sound of things, your boyfriend sounds like the perfect guy. The most important thing a guy can do in this scenario is to be patient and not rush you. Since he knows you’re a virgin, and has stuck around, you don’t have to worry about him having bad intentions. When you’re ready, you’ll just know.
I’ll let you in on a little secret: your first time will be pretty awkward. But I’ll let you in on something else: if you’re with the right person, it won’t even matter. It’s plainly just one of those things you look back on and laugh about. Heck, my first time felt like a variation on the worst game of “Twister” in history. Legs were flying around and I won’t go into details, but it was hilarious. Luckily, this won’t be your boyfriend’s first rodeo, so he may last longer than it takes for you to ask, “Is it in?” This will actually be a good thing because he’ll be able to pace himself for you because it will likely be uncomfortable.
Remember, don’t be afraid to laugh about it. You’ve got the right guy already, so there’s no need to worry about if you’re making a mistake. If you are nervous, have a drink or two to loosen up. When you’re getting your freak on, try not to worry and just relax because after all, it is supposed to be fun. Even if it goes terribly, you’ll be relieved to know that it’s over and before long, you’ll be dying to spice things up.
I’m not sure if you’re at all worried about how he’ll react, but I can’t imagine that his expectations are too high. If he’s the great guy you described, he’ll understand that it may take a couple times until it’s great for the both of you. Think of it this way, for a while, each time will be “the best sex you’ve ever had.”
Photo Credits:
Couple Kissing