We all need a little guidance now and then, so whether you’re stressed about a fling gone wrong, a wrecked relationship or how to handle a stage-five clinger, Real Live College Guy Mark is here to help you navigate the college dating scene!
Hello! So I’m a sophomore, and last year I made a great group of friends. After hanging together for a few months, I started to crush on one of my friends. I like him because he knows how to listen, and I feel like we “get” each other. He has also done a couple of beautiful things for me (he gifted me a notebook he bought on his last trip for my b-day because he knows I write a diary…). However when we go out to a party or a club, he talks to everyone but kind of ignores me. I don’t know what to make of it and I don’t want to get my hopes up. – Am I Friend Zoned?
Dear Am I Friend Zoned,
To answer your question, yes—you’re being friend zoned! Having a crush is perfectly normal though. It’s very easy to start liking someone you start to hang out with, especially for only a few months. But by the looks of it, you’re saying when you guys are out, he talks to other people. Just because he gifts you things or listens well doesn’t mean he’s interested. Those are things that good friends do for each other. If you two have been friends for months, he would’ve made a move by now without any hesitation. There are signs of when a guy is interested in getting with you. For instance, you guys are always with a group of friends. If he wanted to make a move or be with you only, he would ask to hang out with just the two of you. Or when you guys are at a party or club, he would give you his undivided attention and flirt with you a little. Don’t get your hopes up—it isn’t worth it. If he were interested, he would’ve made a move by now. Just enjoy your friendship with him. This crush isn’t worth losing a good friend. They’re hard to come by today.
-Mark