Ladies, good news! As a young millennial who has never used a dating site before, I was excited to experiment to see if one’s dating profile actually matters. With many friends who haven’t had the best of luck using OkCupid, I decided to see for myself if this truly is the best dating site for millennials.
After three days on the site, during which I received 60 messages, I have come to the conclusion that what you write on your profile does not matter. You will still get guys who message you clearly because they like your picture, guys who definitely did not read anything you wrote.
For reference, here is what my profile looked like:
I started by using a picture from summer of my obscured face with a blue Instagram filter. Then I filled out a profile that paints me as an immature, narcissistic and desperate young woman. My occupation was being a hair model who had celebrity aspirations from her YouTube channel. I also answered around twenty match questions to get a percentage rate. Within seconds of me filling out my profile, I got a slew of messages that ranged from “Want a dick pic?” to “Hey sexy.”
I thought the whole point of using OkCupid instead of Tinder was to find meaningful relationships, by filling out profiles rather than swiping right. Still, people sent generic and mass-produced messages to me. I can see how annoying that might be, and I can understand where my friends are coming from when they say guys make no effort, even online.
Although there were a few truths to my profile, such as me being married and vegetarian, for the rest of the profile I lied my ass off. I would say most men randomly skimmed my profile and pulled something off there to start conversation, from asking me if I still had my frozen hamster to whether I could link them to my prized YouTube channel.
I was surprised people commented on my picture, saying I was beautiful or gorgeous. I personally would not message someone whose face was hidden; perhaps I looked more mysterious. I was also shocked there were so many people on the site, even during normal work hours. I can see how frustrating it can be for women who laboriously slave over their profile, thinking it’s not good enough or doesn’t portray them in the right kind of light, especially since my experiment confirmed most men skip most of what you write in lieu of your pictures.
I am happy to report that most people on OkCupid don’t approve of infidelity. Some asked me why I was on this site if I was married, despite my profile listing me as non-monogamous. Others said I blatantly contradicted myself, saying I was married but told people to contact me if they wanted a wife. Many demanded, rather rudely, to know whether I was hitched or not, and there are some people who truly cared about my hamster and asked if I wanted to talk about it, and I greatly appreciated that.
My conclusion from this experiment is that online dating is just like dating in real life. There will still be duds, but maybe when the time is right, you’ll meet someone that is right for you. Also, you don’t have to spend hours fixating on what to write or answer thousands of match questions. Men who were a twenty percent match for me still contacted me. It’s amusing to see what kind of people are out there, and dating profiles can definitely give you a quick ego boost. But like all great love stories, sometimes it takes fate to bring you your perfect someone, and I promise you, it’ll happen sooner than you think.