We all know that Tinder is crawling with creeps, weirdos and just all-around-gross guys. But every now and then, you’ll come across someone who seems to be the whole package: smart, charming and totally attractive. So you swipe right, excited to talk to our new match… until that first message comes in: “I’d love to treat you like a snowstorm…” You don’t even want to know what comes next. What does that even mean?!
You may be so shocked that you don’t know how to reply, but the creeps of Tinder need to know that talking to women like this is not okay. It’s time to stock our arsenals with replies that are just as outrageous as the messages we get on a regular basis. Study up with these awesome comebacks so that when one of these creeps says something out of line, you know just how to respond.
1. Tell him the right way to go about expressing his interest
Some guys just don’t know how to court a woman.
2. Psychoanalyze him
If you can locate the root cause of his grossness, maybe he can finally get the help he needs.
3. Flip the script
Give him something he wouldn’t expect. But, like, maybe tone down the murderous undertones.
4. Let him know you love your body as it is—au naturel
He’ll realize you won’t conform to conventional standards of beauty.
5. Shed light on his sense of entitlement
You’re not obligated to give him anything, even a “chance” with you.
6. Explain why you won’t lower your standards just because it’s an app
You’re supposed to be courteous and respectful to women at all times.
7. Explain why his past failures should have no bearing on how he treats you
Just because he’s had no success with girls before does not mean he gets to be disrespectful to you.
8. Tell him up front his sexual prowess has no bearing on your life
You’d rather hear about his personality, or—even better—his thoughts on how women should be treated.
9. Call him out for not acting his age
Controlling your impulses is part of being an adult, no?
10. Refuse his attempts to explain away the word “no”
No, my lack of interest doesn’t stem from my history with men. I’m just not interested.
11. Let him know he doesn’t have to be bound by the patriarchy, either
Guys have it hard sometimes, too. They could use a dose of feminism as well!
12. Keep it short and sweet
Plain and simple.
13. Don’t let him call the shots
He can’t be gross and then expect you not to have an opinion on it!
14. Don’t be afraid to call yourself a die-hard feminist
You’re a human being who deserves to be valued and treated with respect.
It’s so easy to be silent when confronted with behavior that’s offensive to us. We may think, “If I just don’t reply, he’ll leave me alone.” But Tinder creeps don’t limit their harassment to the virtual sphere—they carry it out into the real world, too. Their offensive behavior is not okay, no matter the platform. We have to let them know that we won’t suffer or tolerate this. Speak up!