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A Freshman Girl’s Guide to Frat Parties

Posted Aug 13 2013 - 2:00pm

best friends drinking college frat party

DO Pick a wing-woman and mingle.
Feel free to talk to new people even if they don’t approach you first. If you want guys to approach you (and trust me, they will), make yourself look available and interested by standing in an area that is somewhat open with music that isn’t too loud. Before you know it, two guys will be heading your way to talk to you and your friend. Just hope you both don’t have your eyes on the same guy! Allie, a junior at Princeton says, “Try not to hang around with more than one or two other girls so guys will feel more comfortable talking to you! Even if you arrive to the party with all of your girls, don't feel the need to stick with them – branch off with a friend to go get a drink. This will make meeting new people a lot easier.”

DON’T ask a random guy for a drink.
Ben Kassoy, a recent graduate of Emory University says,“Do some searching or strike up a conversation before you immediately request alcohol.”
If you choose to drink, be safe about it: Don’t put your drink down and come back later and drink from it, don’t take a drink from the mysterious punch bowl and don’t let anyone else get your drink for you. The only way you will know exactly what you’re drinking is if you watch where it comes from and never leave your glass unattended. Your best bet is to drink a can of beer that you open yourself (or of course even better would be to not drink at all).

DO know the house rules for beer pong and flip cup. 
These are great party games—when you know how to play the right way. Ask for the next game and wait around for your turn so you don’t miss out. Alaine suggests “enlisting the cute guy nearby to play with you.”  If you’re nervous about drinking when you play these games, no one will know if it’s just water in your cup.

DON’T wander into a random person’s room.
Sometimes it’s nice to get away from the crazy party and hang out in one of the brothers’ rooms, but only do this if you consider the guy to be one of your friends, not just one of the frat bros. It’s smart to bring one of your girl friends with you too. If you do get stuck alone in a room with a guy and feel uncomfortable, tell him you have to go to the bathroom and then leave.

DO bring tissues, hand sanitizer and emergency tampons in your purse. 
Frat bathrooms are gross (imagine puke in the sinks and pee in the showers), and you don’t want to be unprepared so make sure you have these items handy. “Few frat house bathrooms are always stocked with TP,” Alaine says. If you are friends with one of the brothers, ask to use another, cleaner bathroom. I’m not making any promises, but there’s usually a more sanitary bathroom reserved for girlfriends, frequent attendees of the frat and the brothers themselves.

bouncer giving number

DON’T give out your number like it’s water. 
Be selective with who you give it to. Not every bro is worthy of your digits. What should you do if a guy asks for your number and you don’t want to give it? Allison from the University of Michigan says, “Normally I’d just give him the wrong number or act like I need to leave really fast and tell him I’ll let him know it when I come back and then never come back.” Looking for a different approach? Allison uses the following line on boys:“How about you give me your number and I’ll text you with mine.” But she doesn’t actually text them her number.  Sneaky!

frat party friends college

DO use knowing the brothers to your advantage ... whether he’s your closet guy friend from high school, your older brother’s best friend or your roommate’s boyfriend.
This will get you VIP treatment at the party: no waiting in line, special mixed drinks and a place to store your coat. If you’re the lucky girl who personally knows a guy in the frat, call or text him when you arrive so he can come to the door and let you in. “At one of my first frat parties, I walked to the front of the line and named some guys I knew who were in the frat and friends with my older sister in hopes of getting in. This didn’t work, so I called one of the guys I knew and he came right out and let us in,” says Maddie* from Michigan State University.

DON’T be the first one to arrive or the last one to leave. 
It’s weird if you show up right at the Facebook event start time and realize you are the only guest there besides the guys in the frat. Instead, show up about an hour into the party and stay for a maximum of two hours.

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