The Men Tell All special, held before each finale of The Bachelorette, is usually one of the most entertaining and scandalous episodes of the entire season. You can count on drama, bloopers, and that one guy who was barely even on the show trying to incessantly share his opinions. But aside from a few glorious moments of pure wackiness, this year’s Men Tell All was surprisingly tame and, might we say, boring. So here are 11 things we wish would’ve happened during the show.
1. Fewer apologies
Gone are the days when the Men Tell All was the arena to throw down and cause a stir one last time before fading into reject oblivion. But apologies from the likes of Ian—who actually got down on his knees to beg forgiveness—and first night drunk Ryan may have been the adult thing to do… but not what we want to see on television.
2. A Clint and JJ fight
Clint and JJ’s “bromance” was one of the most hotly debated subjects of the evening. But we were looking for these two to finish what was started when Kaitlyn dismissed Clint many moons ago. Is it too much to ask that a punch be thrown every once in a while?
3. The Ben vs. Ben for Bachelor debate
We’re pretty sure we know who our next Bachelor will be, but Ben Z. and Ben H. were neck-and-neck when it came to audience reaction. A brief pause from the long soliloquies of lost love with Kaitlyn would’ve been welcome if it ushered in a pros-and-cons discussion about which would make the better Bachelor.
4. A verbal spat we could actually believe
Follow any of these fellas on social media, and you can tell they’re all buds. Then all these confrontations had to be producer-provoked, right? And it seemed every time one of them got revved up to really start something they backed down as soon as another stepped in to defend Kaitlyn’s honor. Can’t we all just not get along?
5. Say something, Tony
What a wasted opportunity! Tony sat quietly in the back row all evening as we kept waiting for the bonsai papa to say his piece… but nothing. We can only hope that this is because he will be receiving his own spin-off in the near future.
6. The guys’ take on the Shawn/Nick feud
Yes, we cringed for the brief second that Shawn and Nick were mentioned during this episode, and not having them there was the break we needed before we suffer through three hours of heated stares and pointed conversations next week. But we did find it odd that their feud was never addressed. And we would’ve loved to get some inside information on what happened between the two while the cameras were off. Like, maybe they’re secretly the best of friends… or not.
7. That Corey never existed
Perhaps that’s a bit harsh. But you were on this show for like one episode, Corey. (Excuse us if you stuck around longer because we can’t seem to remember.) Anyway, you have zero perspective here, so we’re going to need you to shush now, okay?
8. More behind the scenes secrets
Ben H. provided some quite valuable insight on favoritism within the show when he shared that Shawn was in a king bed while he slept in a cot, not to mention the juicy details he gave us about Kaitlyn sneaking away from her handlers. We loved that Ben was keeping it real, but we want more!
9. Two full hours of Amy Schumer
The bloopers at the end of the episode that allowed us to revisit Amy Schumer’s cut-too-short time on this season were without a doubt the highlight of our night. We gladly would’ve sat through two hours of her jokes if it meant those boring ‘ole boys stayed home.
10. A better Bachelor in Paradise preview
The snippets of Paradise teasers we saw on commercial breaks were just not enough. So we were left wondering why ABC didn’t take the opportunity to really promote their fun-in-the-sun, I-can-date-a-lot-of-people-at-the-same-time-too series with an extended preview during the show.
11. Kaitlyn standing up for herself instead of Chris Harrison having to do it for her
Some people are applauding the show’s willingness to call out Kaitlyn’s cyberbullies on air. But this segment went a little too far in some ways. First of all, reading cruel tweets and making Kaitlyn cry about them all over again was a bit much. If you’re on Twitter or keep up with Bachelor Nation even in the slightest, you’ve likely already seen messages like these plastered all over the Internet. But what really stung is that the show felt the need to have Chris Harrison defend Kaitlyn, as if she couldn’t handle that herself.
What were you hoping to see on the Men Tell All, collegiettes?