Many Jewish collegiettes can relate to the feeling of going from Shana Tovah to “Is Yom Kippur-OVAH?”
You know what we’re talking about…the real Hunger Games.
The struggle is real, but the feeling of completing a Yom Kippur fast is so worth it. Besides that, it’s great to atone your sins (like that time you skipped your night class to watch the Oscars). So congratulations! Here is your chance to ring in the new year with a clean slate…and the seven stages that come with all the ~feels~ of fasting.
1. Being reminded that the fast is coming
You’re not sure how this happens every year. Maybe it’s the overload of apples and honey going to your head, or the fact that school just started and you haven’t organized your planner. Regardless, you get that heads up from your friend that has it together, “Hey! Are you going to fast this year?” and realize it is actually happening.
2. Feasting before the fast, when calories don’t exist (win!)
Game on. It’s time to take on all the #foodgoals so you can make it through the next 25 hours. That’s right, collegiettes: you have the perfect opportunity to treat yourself to three bagels. Nobody is going to stop you. Oh, and consider taking your Insta foodie pic during the meal, because you totally know better than to post one on Yom Kippur…right? Right.
3. Waking up on Yom Kippur with complete confidence
It’s a good thing you set a reminder on your phone so you don’t accidently make a bowl of cereal. You’re so full of confidence and know you can make it through. So confident that you’re not even upset that you dreamt about pizza. Oh, and you’re definitely not tempted by your pumpkin spice scented candle. You’re unstoppable.
4. That first stomach grumble
You’re lying in bed and it happens. 2:00 p.m. Whatever, maybe that was just a lawn mower outside—totally not your stomach? So you head back to sleep for what you think is three hours, only to wake up to another grumble at 2:27 p.m. You lie there, trying to think of anything but food.
5. Using your Phone-a-Friend lifeline
You have that (almost) defeat where you think that if your friend breaks, you can break. You just want to check-in. So you call, “Hey! Are you still fasting?” Of course she is. She told you that she isn’t even hungry. And that she’s so proud of you. Good thing you were just calling to check in, and not calling for a way out.
6. The smell of the break-fast feast being prepared
You make it to a point where the day as flown by and break-fast is being prepared! You’re asking if the food is ready every two minutes, and you’re not quite sure you can make it. But this is the final countdown and you have come SO far.
7. BREAK-FAST (emphasis on fast)
The word breakfast has a whole new meaning. You’ve got the green light, and you’re quickly eating whatever you want. You’ve basically forgotten anything that happened today and connect with every bite on a ~spiritual level~. This is an out-of-body experience that you’ve earned.
You post a status on every social media letting your friends know that YOU completed Yom Kippur. The best news? You have 365 days until the next one.
Are you ready for the ultimate Hunger Games, collegiettes?