There are so many stereotypes out there that aren’t always true. When it comes to lesbian stereotypes, things can get pretty ridiculous! Whether you’ve been victim of a lesbian stereotype or assumed one about someone else, Her Campus is here to set things straight. We’ve talked to collegiettes and come up with a list of lesbian stereotypes that just aren’t always true. Take notes, ladies!
1. Lesbians all play softball
There could not be a more ridiculous stereotype. A lot of women play softball, and not all of them are lesbians! People play softball based on if they enjoy the sport, not based on how they choose to identify themselves sexually. “A lot of times people think that all softball players are lesbians,” shares Nicole Paiotti, a junior at Rowan University. “But that’s just not true.” Just because some softball players are more muscular than other girls doesn’t mean they are lesbians. Being muscular has to do with your body type and how often you work out!
2. Lesbians can’t be feminine
Saying that lesbians can’t be feminine can be insulting to lesbians who enjoy embracing their femininity. While some lesbians want to look more masculine, others like girly clothing and makeup. It’s all about personal preference!
Ashley Lessa, a junior at Emerson College, says that some lesbians (like herself) enjoy feminine things like makeup and fashion. “I don’t wear snapbacks or boxers but I am equally as much of a lesbian as those who choose to wear more traditionally ‘masculine’ clothing,” she says.
Alexandra Sakellariou, a junior at McGill University, agrees. “Turns out some of us do like pink, sparkles and some good old retail therapy,” she adds. “When I tell people I’m into girls, they’re always surprised because I don’t ‘look’ like I’m lesbian or bi.” Ditch the idea that lesbians have to look a certain way! Each person has their own look outside of their sexuality.
3. Lesbians hate men
Saying that lesbians hate men is like saying that straight women hate women—so untrue! Just because you aren’t attracted to a certain sex doesn’t mean that you can’t develop a positive relationship with them and be friends. “I’m not sure why people think that lesbians hate men,” says Brooke Pearson, a junior at James Madison University. “Straight women don’t hate other women! It’s the same scenario.”
4. Lesbians just haven’t been with the right guy yet
Saying that lesbians are only attracted to females because they haven’t been with the right guy yet is insulting to their sexual preferences. They like girls because that’s who they’re attracted to! No one tells straight women that they’re straight because they haven’t been with the right girl yet. A woman’s sexual preferences should only concern herself.
5. Lesbians will crush on all their female friends
Some people also think that all lesbians will develop crushes on their girl friends…wrong again! Straight girls don’t have crushes on all their guy friends, and it’s the same way for lesbians. “I have a bunch of lesbian friends and they don’t hit on me,” says Emily Montgomery, a student at Cape Fear Community College. Don’t push away friendships with lesbians out of fear that they’ll develop a crush on you—you never know when a lifelong bond could form.
6. In lesbian couples, one person is “the man”
Many people think that when it comes to lesbian couples, one person is the “man” and one person is the “woman.” Talk about heteronormative! A lesbian couple is just two women who have feelings for each other. Let’s work together as collegiettes to eliminate these stereotypes and stop assuming things about people that we don’t know are true!
7. Lesbians drive SUVs
Assuming that lesbians drive SUVs is pretty ridiculous—what does car preference have to do with sexuality? Some straight women drive SUVs, some lesbian women drive SUVs and some bi women drive SUVs. See a pattern? Didn’t think so. There is not a certain type of car that lesbian women are programmed to drive! Let’s ditch these ideas that are in our heads and start being more open.
Now that we’ve established that these stereotypes aren’t always true, you should be more open-minded and considerate with lesbian friends and acquaintances. Stereotypes can be offensive no matter who they’re about, so it’s important to take a step back and consider what you’re assuming before someone gets hurt.