Jessica Goldstein

You know what’s kind of funny about sexuality? It’s surprisingly tough to talk about. Sex, that’s easy (although certainly you could argue that, well, why talk about it…) Actions are simple and straightforward like that. But sexuality isn’t just about what you do; it’s about who you are. An infinitely trickier topic.
 
It would be a challenge, even in some kind of super safe, isolated chamber filled only with supportive loved ones, for a girl to come out. Female homosexuality is a topic around which our culture still gets awfully skittish. Sure, we’ve embraced gay guys, at least on a superficial level (they can be your best friends! Or pretend to be straight and promiscuous! OMG loves it!) if not a meaningful one. When presented with gay girls, though, it’s like our brains go on lockdown. Is she just saying she’s a lesbian because guys think it’s hot? Going through an undergrad “experimental” phase, like our parents did with acid? She doesn’t look like a lesbian—as if, like for preppies, there is actually a guide for that. And so on.
 

Five minutes until your date shows up and you’re still sporting a bathrobe. Ten minutes to get ready for a class that’s an eight-minute walk away. Time is just one of those weird things— there's an infinite supply, but never enough when you need it. Worry not! You may never have the kind of time you want, but you really have all the time you need. That’s why we’re here to provide you with: What To Do When You’re Late …unless you’re pregnant, in which case there’s nothing we can do.

Scenario No. 1: Late night, early morning.

Want to look awake like Blake? You slept in after getting just two hours of sleep, and you’ve got a Mount-Vesuvius-sized zit and a lecture in 15 minutes. That hot rugby player you’ve been eyeing will inevitably be sitting next to you.

When we opened up our online lockbox of reader submissions for decoding, the responses ranged from racy to ridiculous. Yet none of your exchanges made us want to call upon our hot guy panel to start the translation process. Frankly readers, we were a little disappointed. DIG DEEPER. You’ve got one more week before we start decoding and, as we are giving you our very best, we expect nothing less from you.

However, like tide and time, we wait for no (wo)man. The textucation process can commence immediately, even without your convos.

There are several types of truly “sucky” texters, and we are here to help you not suck. Read on to learn about how to avoid being a tragic texting type.

“Sorry I didn’t get your Text”ers
If a boy tells you he “didn’t see your text,” check to see if his phone apparatus has been run over by a tractor. If this did not occur, he is most likely lying. Let’s just say Megan Fox had texted him instead of you. We have this feeling he would have found a way to get that.

Just kidding. Look at Megan. There’s no way she would be texting your boyfriend.

Under-the-Table Texters
Anyone with mediocre vision knows what under-the-table texting looks like. It’s a little glowing light that reflects on your face and a sudden blank stare that implies you are concentrating very hard on not-the-person-in-front-of-you. Stop being a freak who stares at her crotch and engage with the real person at the table with you, or people will stop asking you out.

The time for end-of-year-recaps is officially upon us. Everybody on the interwebs is going crazy ranking the best albums of 2010, the best movies, the best inventions. TIME magazine makes like that guy from High Fidelity and lists, literally, everything.

There is an awful lot to rank, readers. It’s been a big year. The oil spilled. The Wikis leaked. The earth quaked. We said goodbye to Alexander McQueen and J.D. Salinger—who, to be fair, said goodbye to the rest of us, like, sixty years ago when he turned into a social recluse and moved into the woods. We watched Leonardo DiCaprio spin a magic dreidel and steal our dreams. We rallied to restore sanity. We cried at Toy Story 3. We vuvuzela-ed. We demanded to be taught how to dougie. We asked and told before the 25th, which means Senate can continue to believe in both Santa Claus and Christmas miracles. And to all a good night, indeed.

While other news outlets might want to focus on, well, news, here at Her Campus, we know what really matters when you look back on the past twelve months of your life. How do you measure a year? We do it Jonathan Larson-style: in love.