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5/2/2012 |
Guys ask me all the time, “do girls act ditzy on purpose?” Although I’m not sure if it is on purpose, I do know that some girls do not act up to their potential. Some girls may be afraid to say something wrong or embarrassing, so they retreat to acting like they really don’t know anything. In reality, they do. Others may think that guys prefer to be the “intellectual” one in the partnership, and they therefore must act “dumb.” I’m here to say that neither of these claims are valid.
Don’t be afraid to say something wrong or embarrassing. Guys like girls who will talk to them. Really talk. “I like a girl I can have a real conversation with,” one guy said. Don’t worry about being wrong. Being able to talk from the heart makes your more genuine, more real. Guys like that.
“Others will look down on you if you act ditzy on purpose,” I was told. Clearly guys don’t dig the ditzy act, and they don’t think others do either. “I would rather spend time with someone who will be herself.” You are the most attractive when you act like yourself. Forget pretending to be someone you’re not. Guys don’t like it, and you shouldn’t either.
Don’t belittle yourself for a guy. Or for anyone. Show off how smart, quick, and witty you are. He’ll like you all the more for it.
“Be yourself. That’s the bottom line.” Hey, he said it, not me. Although I do agree.
Being yourself is your best act.
Double X
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4/13/2012 |
I bet the first thing you’re thinking is, “what could be wrong with getting my nails done?” Honestly, nothing. Until it goes too far. And by that, I mean too far for guys. Girls have a different understanding and appreciation for nails. Guys, not so much. If there’s one thing that’s for sure, get your nails done for you, not for a guy.
First and foremost, guys don’t notice or care about things like painted nails. Their minds are focused on other things, most of which are far from the detailed nature of nails. As one guy explained it: “I never really notice whether or not a girl has her nails painted.”
“I find it funny when a girl complains about breaking a $40 nail. Then she gets so paranoid about breaking another that she can’t do anything.” I doubt guys will ever understand why we women do the things we do, but when we do things that limit our feminine power, we’re only hurting ourselves. Some of the overly long and complex fake nails limit a woman’s mobility. Certain tasks become more difficult to complete and, in the end, we are essentially weakening ourselves. Even if you don’t consider yourself a feminist, you still deserve the same power as men.
Guys also don’t see the value in going to the salon. “She gets her nails done, I buy a video game. I think I get more use out of the video game,” one guy told me. Let them think whatever they want. You can spend your money however you see fit, just realize that it may not be as impressive as you think.
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3/24/2012 |
We know them all too well. The MySpace pics. The Profile pics. The endless in-the-mirror pics. And the Duckface. In all honesty, I had never heard of the Duckface until a group of guys informed me of its horror. All girls know the Duckface. Some have even fallen victim to its power. I’m here to tell you, with certainty, that the Duckface does not appeal to the male population.
Taking pictures of yourself is a staple of our society. There’s nothing wrong with it, as long as it’s used with caution. The Duckface refers to that infamous pose, typically in the mirror, where the subject stands with one hand on the hip and lips pursed out like a duck beak.
“It just looks stupid,” one guy told me. Trust me when I say that boys like self portraits, but only ones in good taste. “I don’t think the Duckface is attractive at all,” another said. Guys may think that girls who pose like this are trying too hard for attention. “Don’t force anything,” I was told.
You are the most attractive in your normal stance. It’s what makes you, you. “The more natural, the better,” and I agree with him. Smiles always win guys over. After all, they are contagious, right?
By no means do I write to tell you what to do or how to pose in a picture, but if you pose this way for guys, you may want to rethink your plan of attack. Guys notice the girls who are pretty by being themselves. Remember, “the Duckface doesn’t make you sexy.” You already are.
Quack Quack,
Double X |
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3/16/2012 |
Somewhere, somehow, some way our world became fixated on the concept of male dominance in romantic relationships. Ladies, the times are changing, and so is this ancient philosophy.
It’s always the guy asking the girl. Do you want to see a movie? Do you want to go out to dinner? Do you want to be my girlfriend? Do you want to marry me? The answer: if I want something, I’ll ask for it myself. We woman are strong willed and strong minded. We like getting what we want. So why stop when it comes to dating?
I consider myself to be a feminist. I’m all for equal rights and fair treatment, and personally, I think a girl asking a guy out is perfectly okay. I’m sure some people disagree, but our world is changing and the “rules” are changing with it.
“As long as 2 people want to be together, the asking part doesn’t matter,” as one guy told me. And I agree with him. Stop worrying about he said she said. Just say it and move on with your relationship.
Another source explained: “I like women who are forward, it makes my life easier.” Guys appreciate and even like it when girls take the lead. It takes some of the pressure off of them and balances out the relationship. Often times they may be too nervous or unsure of how to ask, and that will only prolong the painful in-between time while you both wait for something to happen. Think about it. If Cinderella never fought to get to the ball, she would have never met Prince Charming.
“Don’t wait. If you want something, go for it.”
Ask away,
Double X |
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2/27/2012 |
I am by no means a fashion expert, but living on a college campus shows me a thing or two about how girls decide to dress. Here in Syracuse, the weather is more than unpredictable. Unfortunately, the dress code isn’t.
Most girls tend to wear the same things: skinny jeans, Ugg boots, Northface jackets, and spandex. Don’t get me wrong, these are all nice additions to the college wardrobe…except in the winter. Ugg boots are not designed to last through ice, salt, and heavy snow. They absorb the water and scream out in pain at the sight of road salt. While Northface jackets are fashionable and expensive, they just aren’t warm enough in -20 degree weather. As for Spandex, most of them are see-through and clearly not meant for a winter wonderland (Don’t believe me? Take a closer look).
So why do we college girls feel the urge to meet societal fashion rules, even if it means freezing? Do we want to impress boys and feel attractive? Maybe so, but I can tell you right now that guys could care less.
“If a girl chooses to dress poorly in the wintertime and freezes because of it, it’s not my problem. I don’t really care.” Guys have other things to think about besides your choice of coat or boots. With the amount of walking we do on a daily basis, it is up to us to dress accordingly. We have to look out for ourselves and not worry so much about what a guy may think. Besides, there are still fashionable winter outfits that can be worn underneath a nice heavy coat.
“Guys won’t judge you for dressing warm in the winter. You shouldn’t feel any less attractive.”
Winter is a time to be prepared and to be smart. Don’t let others influence you in your choices about clothing, especially guys.
Stay warm,
Double X |
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2/20/2012 |
Hair is that one undesirable thing that just keeps coming back, unless of course it’s on your head. Then we love it. Shaving and waxing our legs and eyebrows is a daunting, painful task that most women have simply accepted as a way of life. But acceptance and obsession are two very different things.
Do guys really care about the arch in an eyebrow? Do they even notice if legs have gone unshaved for a whole 2 days? The answer, quite simply, is no.
“Shaving is a societal thing, not a guy thing,” I was told. In other words, if we didn’t live here and now, hair on our legs may be viewed in an entirely different way. We all think it’s gross only because we’ve been told it’s gross. In reality, it’s still a part of our bodies, so unless you think noses, fingers, and elbows are gross too, it’s time to accept a little stubble.
When it comes down to shaving your legs, “you can’t even tell.” I didn’t just make that up ladies, that came right from a male source. “It’s not like other guys are going to walk up to you and inspect your legs.” Stop wearing pants because you went a day without shaving. Stop being ashamed and worried what guys might think. Love your legs. They’re one of your best features.
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2/14/2012 |
It seems that we girls today are so overly concerned with appearances…and for good reason. With constant reminders of what we’re “supposed” to look like staring back at us from Victoria Secret catalogs and magazine advertisements, most of us lose all sense of what is normal. Body image is important to almost every girl, but where do we draw the line?
Body weight is a constant worry for all of us, but how much do guys really care? I think it’s safe to say that a healthy body weight is important to everyone, but I know there are girls out there who think even that isn’t good enough. One guy told me: “There’s a reason why it’s called ‘healthy weight’…it looks good.” This constant paranoia about being too fat just isn’t necessary. Believe it or not, looking healthy and looking “good” are the same thing.
“I like a girl who takes care of her body, regardless of what size she may be.” We women come in all shapes and sizes. It doesn’t make sense to even try to compare one body to another, especially with those that are hand selected, manicured and photo-shopped to be in movies and advertisements. Girls that take too much time fussing over every pound only turn guys away faster. “Girls that are so concerned about their weight tend to lose sense of the world around them and forget to live.”
Guys tend to focus on the simple things, as opposed to us girls who think about anything and everything all at once. “I’d much rather have a girl with some meat on her bones. It’s much better for cuddling.” Like I said, the simple things. Two or three pounds may make all the difference in the world to you, but your man won’t care at all when he’s holding you close.
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2/7/2012 |
Tonight is date night. You feel that rush of nervous-excitement, constantly checking your hair and face for any slight imperfection. He’s taking you to a great restaurant. As you read over the menu, that little voice in your head screams reasons why every choice is a bad one. “Don’t get chicken wings, he’ll think you’re a slob.” “Don’t get a burger, he’ll think you’re a pig.” “Don’t even think about dessert, he’ll think you’re fat.”
Ladies, trust me when I say that there is only one thing he will be thinking about: “Me hungry! Me want food!”
Clearly men don’t think in cavemen lingo, or at least most of them don’t, but I can assure you that on a date, he will likely be more concerned with his own stomach than with your meal choice. One of my undercover sources so eloquently stated: “When I’m hungry, I inhale my food. I don’t pay attention to what she eats or doesn’t eat.”
All too often we find ourselves caught up in calorie counting. While I am not here to discourage healthy living, I am here to say that we don’t have to do it out of concern for what boys may think. By all means, eat that salad, but don’t be afraid to chow down on your favorite foods. Another male source told me: “I would much rather date a girl who will order something off the menu based on how good it sounds and not how many calories it contains.” Guys like girls who can be real and honest in front of them, and that includes what you eat.
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1/30/2012 |
Most women admit that with beauty comes pain and sacrifice. We crimp, curl, flat iron, blow dry, wax, paint, bleach, and dye ourselves into pristine condition. My question is, why?
So often we get it in our heads that guys actually like all these things. Sorry, ladies, they don’t. How do I know such intimate knowledge? I have my sources.
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